Page 97 of Dangerous Play

But when it came to Ivy and me, nothing was like it was supposed to.

And especially not matches.

There was one last match that fell on the day of her marathon that I had marked in my calendar since January. I wanted to be there to support her and cheer her on, but that was the last friendly game before the team announcements and I should be there to show my talent one more time and secure a starting position.

I really put my best foot forward in the training camp and the last friendly game. Despite missing Ivy’s birthday, I was 100% present on the field and focused on the game. I cut out everything else and proved to myself that I could do it. I could be in the game even when my heart was hurting.

But I also realized I didn’t want to live like that. I didn’t want to grow tired of the sacrifice and start hating the game I dedicated my life to. I had to find balance for my sanity.

So there I was, sitting in front of Coach Hitchings as he stared me down.

“You’re telling me you’re not playing?” he asked point-blank after I gave him my speech.

I nodded, a knot in my throat. “I can’t. I’m sorry. I played against Spain when I couldn’t. This is really inconvenient for me.”

His eyes narrowed. “Your coaches and professors cleared you.”

“I never said it was inconvenient for my schoolwork.” I shrugged, a signature smile on my face. “I’m on top of it; I’ve passed all my midterms.”

“Don’t beat around the bush, Aarons. Just give it to me straight.”

I took a deep, shaky breath. “I missed the birthday of the girl I love to play against Spain. I did that because I knew I had to. Soccer is my life. I love the game, and I would do anything for the win. But... she came from a rough previous relationship where she was never first, and with soccer, I can’t put her first. I put her second, chose to come play here, and be here instead of pursuing her. Now... I don’t think she’ll just take me back and we can get back to where we left things off, but I have a chance to prove to her that I can put her first, that she can place her faith in me. And I want to take it. Unfortunately, this chance collides with our friendly game against Germany. But I think I’ve proved myself enough during the camp and the previous friendly, as well as through all my soccer career so far, that I’m a player who can hold his own and that you can rely on.”

“This happens to be the same girl you had an important discussion about during the Soccer Cup final?” Aiden arched a curious brow, and I ducked my head in shame.

“Yeah. Same girl.”

Coach Hitchings let out a long sigh. “So, if I tell you, you will not make the World Cup squad if you don’t play the friendly game?”

I bit into my lower lip, my heart hammering in my chest. I thought I could convince him that he would let me off the hook and still make a decision.

“You are one of the top midfielders we have. I would be crazy not to put you on the team,” Coach went on, noticing my inner turmoil. “But this season you’ve shown your head is your biggest asset and your worst enemy. I need a player who has his headclear and focused on the game during the World Cup. Can you promise me that if I let you go, you’ll be 100% focused?”

Tilting my head, I wanted to nod, but I couldn’t predict Ivy’s reaction—what she was going to say or how she would respond. All I knew was that I had this chance, and I needed to take it, whatever the outcome.

“No, I can’t, because I don’t know what will happen. But I can promise you that no matter the outcome, if you put me on that field during any of the World Cup games, I will be present and pull through, just like I did against Spain and during the camp. I was fucking hurting every single day of that camp, dying of heartache, and it didn’t impact my game. When it matters, I am there. That’s the player I am, and that won’t change. The decision is up to you.”

IVY

The loud noise and buzzing of runners fueled me with so much energy and happiness that I didn’t even care about the little wind we were experiencing. It was a beautiful April day, and I couldn’t be happier or prouder that I was about to run my first marathon.

Did I wish it was under different circumstances? Yes.

But the support of my sister, parents, and my girls meant a lot to me. They all scattered all over on the other side of the corridor, and even Liam, Derek, and Maddox came to cheer me on and keep the girls company during the almost five-hour-long event.

My goal was to run it in four and a half hours, hopefully, and with all the training I was confident I could do it. But anything under four hours and forty-five minutes was acceptable for my first time.

I fixed my cute black running skort that Nova got me and checked that my running vest was properly secured, filled with my soft water bottles with electrolytes and some recovery gel and gummies. It was a game changer having male athletes with me through this journey because their supplement knowledge was incredible. I had never tried as many different gels and proteins in my life as I did during the preparation.

It was kind of bittersweet that this journey was ending, but I was ready for some new challenges after I proved to myself that I could do this and anything I set my mind to.

All it took was my self-discipline.

Glancing at the sidelines, I watched as Daisy laughed at something Rosie said, and my heart warmed from seeing the two of them get along so well. All the girls and even the Titan guys welcomed Daisy into the group with open arms. They were just as welcoming and kind to her as they were with me, despite none of us having any Titan connections anymore.

My heart sank a bit as I looked around for Max. My brain knew he wasn’t there, as the US National Team was playing Germany in a friendly game. I was planning to listen to the broadcast while running because then it felt like we were running together. It was a silly little thing, but it gave me peace and tricked me into believing Max was by my side when in reality, we were running two very different courses.

Letting out a long sigh, I went through the warm-up exercises I always did and tried to force my brain to focus on the run ahead of me. I closed my eyes during my static stretches, allowing myself to feel the wind on my face, the rocky pavement under my foot, and the endless chatter and noise from the other runners getting ready to take their spots in line.

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