Page 89 of Let's Pretend I'm Okay

My heartbeat pounds in my ears. Why is this question so hard to answer? It’s supposed to slip out easy and absolute, not be forced. “Of course not.”

She looks away, blinking as she shakes her head. “You never used to lie to me, Margo, but now it’s all you do.”

“Annie, I didn’t—”

“You what? You didn’t think about how I’d feel?” She bites her lip to stop it from wobbling.

All of my energy has been zapped out of me. I said I didn’t want to make this worse and somehow I did. “I’m sorry.”

She waves me off and pushes past me out of the room.

Sobs bubble out of me, and I hug my knees close. I have to fix this. I have to make it up to her, but I don’t know how. Guilt creeps into my head when I think about the other secret I’m keeping from her. I have to tell her soon, but this is not the right time.

My phone buzzes in my pocket. I take it out and shake my head. It’s Daniel, of all people. How am I supposed to answer his call right now? I can’t, not after the fight with Annie. I can only imagine how she’d react if she heard me talking to him.

I set the phone down and bury my head under Annie’s pillow.

There’s only one solution I can think of to help the situation: I have to stay away from Daniel.

CHAPTER TWENTY-FIVE

DANIEL

I slam the front door and kick my shoes off. My lungs constrict to the point I can’t breathe no matter how hard I try. I gasp for air as hot tears fall to the floor.

I try to get my coat off, to hang it up, but it gets tangled on my arms.

“Daniel, what’s wrong?” Olive asks, appearing out of nowhere. She tries to help me with my coat.

I jerk away from her. “Don’t touch me!” I rip the coat off and throw it down before marching away.

“Daniel, wait. Tell me what’s going on.”

I close my bedroom door, locking it before leaning against it with my full weight. I sink to the ground, not even having enough energy to make it to my bed.

It’s not fair. It’s not right.

My mind is filled with her big brown eyes, the ones I hated so much at first, but now I can’t help but want them. I want her to be a liar. I want this to be a nightmare that’ll be over when I wake up.

Margo is the first person who’s ever made me feel seen.She’s the first person I’ve ever met who made me think my life could be better. That I could find someone to make the pain hurt less.

But this hurts more.

Olive knocks at the door. “Daniel?”

I stare at the wall, ignoring her. Eventually, she’ll get tired and leave me alone.

My mind is numb.

My lungs are raw.

My heart is gutted.

Part of me wanted her to run after me when I left her in that room, but she didn’t. Would it have made a difference? It’s not like it would’ve changed anything. I probably would’ve pushed her away. I would’ve run faster, thinking I’d stop myself from getting hurt any more than I already was.

There’s a fire full of anger building inside me. How could she do this to me? How could she come into my life the way she did and not tell me she was sick?

I wipe my face and dial her number, ready to yell at her and demand an explanation, knowing full well she won’t have one.

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