Page 35 of Let's Pretend I'm Okay

“Leave. Me. Alone,” I say, flicking her forehead to get her to back up.

Her jaw drops as she reaches up to touch her forehead. “Jerk.”

I head to class.

Maybe she’ll get the message and stop harassing me.

“I’ll figure it out even if you don’t tell me,” she calls after me.

CHAPTER TEN

MARGO

I sit at the lunch table, taking an overly aggressive bite of my apple. The crunch echoes against my teeth as I chew. My eyes are laser set on none other than Daniel across the cafeteria.

I hate him. I truly do.

Doesn’t he realize the opportunity I’m trying to give him? Anyone else would jump on my offer in a heartbeat. And yet, he has to go and act like he doesn’t have a care in the world.

Annie sits down in front of me. She’s trying to hold back a smile, but it keeps poking through her cold mask. “Guess what.”

Normally, I don’t have a hard time figuring out what’s on her mind. She likes books, caramel, and the viola. But something tells me this is different. That she did something outside of the box.

“What?”

“You’ll never guess what I did this morning,” she says.

“You ordered a special edition book?”

She shakes her head. “Nope. Not even close.”

“Did you fail a test?”

She grimaces. “Definitely not.”

“Then tell me.”

Her smile breaks free in full force. “I talked to him.”

I choke on my apple.

“Are you okay?” She hands me my drink.

No. Not okay. My body is completely rejecting the idea of my sister ever being with him. I take a sip of my milk, continuing to cough until I can breathe again. I set the milk down. “You what? When?”

Her eyes light up, doing a little happy dance inside of her brain.

I repeat: not okay.

“I ran into him at the library again. Literally,” she says. “I dropped everything, and he helped me pick it up. I think he might’ve even smiled.” She holds up two fingers, pinching them together. “Just a little. Maybe. I don’t want to overthink it.”

Smile? Daniel? No. I can’t even picture it. I don’t think he was born with the necessary muscles in his face.

Annie sets her elbow on the table and rests her head on her hand. “I mean... he’s so dreamy.”

My gaze shifts back to Daniel. He’s not ugly. I’ll give her that. He’s kind of cute in a dark and mysterious way... if you liked that kind of thing. I don’t. I wouldn’t be caught dead with someone like that. I don’t see the appeal.

I’ve never really given much thought about the type of guy I’d like. The first time I got sick was right around the time all of my friends were forming their first serious crushes, but I didn’t let myself go deeper than silly ones that lasted a few days. It wouldn’t have been fair for me to like someone when my future wasn’t guaranteed. Then when I got better, I still felt like a relationship with me was taboo. Everyone knew meas the girl who had cancer. I was scared, tainted by something out of my control.

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