"Well in that case, focus on his forehead and use the wind technique."
"Excuse me?"
"It's a tried and true method. Whenever you have to dance with someone you don't like, imagine that they just passed wind. The bad kind."
I give him the side eye. I can't imagine how that works.
"Use the facial expression you would if someone next to you let out a rotten egg. Like this." He flares his nostrils and his lip lifts in disdain. He stares me down, and even though I know he's pretending it’s from an odorous smell, it does come off as desire.
I bust out laughing. "Oh my God, that's hilarious."
"There's a fine line between sexual tension and smelly farts."