Page 18 of Raptor

"No," she shouts. "No, I'll be fine. I don't need help. I just wanted to talk. I'm sorry, I shouldn't have called. Don't call Pyro. I'm fine." The finality in her tone pisses me off. She's scared, fucking terrified, so why won't she let me have Pyro help her?

"Mal, you've got to fuckin' talk to me. What's goin' on?"

"Nothing," she lies.

"Bullshit. Three months I haven't heard from you. What the fuck? What happened?"

I hear her heavy sigh. "You live in New York, Raptor. I live in Dublin. My life is here and yours is there. Why are we wasting time? What could ever come from this? It's best we just sever ties and leave it as it is."

"You think that's what I want? I know it's not what you want." She's not good at telling lies. Her accent thickens and her voice raises an octave. "So how about we try again? What the hell is going on?"

"I won't destroy your life. I won't trap you into this. Please, Rap, just leave it be."

"Listen to me, darlin', in fifteen weeks, my ass is back in Ireland. I'll be coming for you."

I hear her heavy sigh. "You said that before," she snaps. "I'm not putting my life on hold, Raptor. It's not fair to ask me to do that. It's not right to expect that of me."

"You find someone else?" I growl. The mere thought of her with someone else makes me homicidal.

"No," she shrieks. "God, what do you take me for? You're an ass, Raptor. But I refuse to live in limbo as you decide when you're actually coming for a visit." I hear the sound of a car door slam. "Ma's home. I'll be okay. I'm really sorry for calling you. I hope you have a good night."

"Told you already," I snarl, pissed that she's trying to brush me off, "I'm glad you called, and don't apologize. I've been losin' my fuckin' mind tryin' to figure out what the fuck is goin' on with you. Thought you were hurt or somethin' as you've been ignorin' my calls and texts. But I get it. You're pissed that I haven’t been back to see you. Well, I promise you, Mal, fifteen weeks and I'll be there." I wish it were sooner, but we've got another thirtycustoms to build before I leave and there's no fucking way I can leave my brothers to deal with that alone.

"You know what, Rap, I'll believe it when I see it. Be safe," she whispers as she ends the call.

I stare down at my cell and wonder what the fuck I'm going to do now. I want Py to check in on her, but I know that'll just make things between us even worse. Christ, I'm so fucking torn.

Just over three months and I'll be in Ireland, and when I get there, I'm coming for her.

Chapter 8

Mallory

"How are you doing?" Jess asks as we sit in the waiting area.

Today is my scan day and I've finally, finally decided to find out what the gender of my baby is. I have been thinking long and hard about what's going to happen since the call with Raptor last week. He seemed pretty adamant that he'd be here in just over three months, and if he is, I'll tell him about the baby. I'll have given birth by then.

"I'm doing okay. How about you?" I ask, reaching for her hand.

"The nightmares are still here, but I'm hoping they'll go soon."

I nod. "Me too," I whisper.

The nightmares are horrendous. The sound of Stephen beating Jarlath repeats over and over again. It's terrifying. Not to mention the fear of Fintan finding out that I was there the night his son died. Jess' dad works for Jerry Houlihan, the head of the Houlihan gang. There's no way Fintan would come for her, nor would he go after Stephen. I'm the only one who has no ties to a criminal enterprise, and that's what scares me the most.

"Where's your mam?" Jess questions, glancing around the waiting area for the fourth time since we arrived. I'm not sure if it's in search of Ma, who should be here, or if it's the fear from the night last week.

"She's running late," I tell her with a sigh. "She's been working away and was due back this morning."

Ma promised she'd be here for the scan and I had no reason to not believe her. She's been present so much throughout my pregnancy so far. I'm a little saddened that today—the day we find out the gender—is the day she's late. I'm trying my hardest not to let it get to me, nor am I going to hold it against her. Things like this happen, especially when it's out of our control, and Ma's job is out of my control. So I'm taking deep breaths and praying that she'll make it, especially as my appointment is running late too.

"She'll be here," she assures me. "Your mam knows that she deeply hurt you when you were growing up. She's not going to let you down. Have faith."

Jess continues to amaze me every day. She's been through so very much and yet she has the best and most positive outlook on everything.

"How are things between you and Stephen?" I ask, wondering if she's going to talk to me about him. Over the past week, we've checked in daily but she's not mentioned Stephen at all.

She lifts her shoulders and shrugs. "Eh, I haven't heard from him since that night. But it's okay. That's what Stephen does best. He pops up into my life, makes me feel so many things, and then disappears."

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