Page 56 of Raptor

Once I've finished and he's all clean and changed, I bring the nappy downstairs. The guys are still talking. Their deep voices feel soothing to me, and I'm settled. Even though Ma’s not here, I'm safe with Shane and the guys.

"Who's a good boy?" I say to Shay as we head outside to take the nappy to the trash bin. I run my nose along his cheek and listen to his giggle. I repeat it over and over again as I walk toward the trash.

"There we go, all clean," I say with a grin as he makes a claw to grab my nose. I shake my head, and something across the street catches my eye.

My body turns, and in an instant, it freezes. My eyes focus on the figure hanging from the top window of the neighboring building. A lump forms in my throat as I recognize who it is. My knees give out and I collapse to the ground, a piercing scream escaping my lips. Everything around me seems to be moving in slow motion.

"Mallory?" a voice calls out behind me.

I feel strong hands grip me, pulling Shay from my arms, and then seconds later I'm being lifted into the air and pressed against a solid chest. "Fuck, darlin'." Shane's deep voice rumbles in my ear. "I'm so sorry, baby."

But his embrace offers no solace amidst the chaos. The smell of his cologne mixes with the stench of death and overwhelms my senses. Tears cloud my vision as I struggle to process what has happened.

My mam... God, my mam. She’s hanging from the window across the street. Her once vibrant eyes are now wide and lifeless. It's an image that will haunt me forever.

A suffocating emptiness swallows me whole as I'm crushed against Shane's chest, unable to tear my gaze away from her still form.

Shane's grip tightens around me, a silent anchor in the storm raging inside me. The world blurs around the edges as I cling to him, trying to find some sense of stability amidst the overwhelming grief.

Images of her laughing hit me like a freight train. I remember her touch, and the feel of her unwavering love, each memory like a knife twisting in my already shattered heart.

I let out a guttural sob, the pain of it reverberating through my entire being. I stare at the lifeless figure hanging in thewindow across from me, and I know nothing will ever be the same again. The world I once knew has been irrevocably altered. Shay’s not going to know how amazing his grandmother was.

Thinking about Ma, something else hits me. I push myself away from Shane's grasp, my eyes filled with tears. I clench my jaw so as not to sob right now.

Shane's expression is pained, his own grief mirroring mine. He feels deeply for me, for our son. "Darlin', don’t?—"

"He could be there," I say through gritted teeth, trying to pull from his arms. “He could still be in the house.”

“Trust me, darlin’; Tank’s called the brothers. They’re on the way. It’s goin’ to be okay.”

Tears stream down my face as I shake my head in disbelief. "How?" I sob, my voice breaking. "How is it going to be? She's gone, Shane. She's gone." My heart aches with each word.

My breathing becomes choppy as I gasp for air. "That cry," I gasp, gripping my hair in frustration. "That cry last night. It was her, wasn't it?" The image of her distraught face flashes before me once again and I crumble to the floor. The painful cry we heard last night will be etched into my mind forever.

Oh God, she was alive last night and now she's gone.

"Fuck," Shane growls as he scoops me into his arms and holds me close. I sob against his chest, my entire body trembling.

I can't stop the tears. It's too much. It's too fucking much. I close my eyes and sink deeper into Shane's embrace. He walks us into the house and lies me down on the bed. He holds me tight and I cling to him like he's my lifeline. It's not long until I cry myself to sleep.

I wake up to hushed tones and open my eyes. They feel so heavy, just as my body does. Shay is fast asleep beside me. I watch as his chest rises and falls. I'm numb right now. I have no idea what to feel. I'm just in such an empty space.

"It's fucked up, brother," I hear Pyro say. "That cunt has been livin' across the road to Mallory for God knows how long."

I freeze, unable to believe what I'm hearing.

"Fucker's been watchin' her," Shane snarls. "Just as she thought he was."

"You think he had Jayne there the whole time?" Pyro questions, and my tears once again start to fall.

We could have helped her. God, we could have saved her.

"I want Mallory and Shay at the clubhouse," Shane says, his words filled with anger. "That fucker could get her," he snarls. "I can't have that. I can't lose either of them."

I reach for Shay's hand and he clenches it around my finger. Shane's right, we can't be here. We're not safe.

It's all too much. There are too many memories of Ma.

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