Page 66 of Redeeming

“Let’s not forget about you.” I take a step toward Maddox, and Lucky and Rome both take a step back. It would almost be funny, if it wasn’t. “God, I looked up to you. For years, I looked up to you. You had this circle of friends that I would have given anything to be a part of. You held those girls up on pedestals. Hell, you still do. Our cousins. The twins. You respected the hell out of them.I watched. For years I watched, and I was jealous.”

I pull the blanket tighter, as if it can protect me from the pain.

The pain the men in this room caused.

“But you never let me in that circle, did you, Maddox? You hold your friends up to such high standards and in such high regards. There’s only one problem with that—the higher you hold someone, the harder they fall.” I laugh. “I should know. But God forbid one of those friends is interested in me. I mean, it’s not like he’s worthy of my love. Right, big brother?” My voice grows incrementally louder with each new thought, but Maddox stays quiet. Guess he’s taking a page out of Dad’s book.

I really wish he wouldn’t.

I’m hungry for a fight.

I want a bad guy.

I want something or someone to focus all this anger on.

“He’s good enough to be your best friend, but not good enough for me?” I shove Maddox’s chest, but he doesn’t budge. “That’s rich, asshole. Do you know he didn’t want to let anything happen because of you. I fucking loved him, and he made me promise we wouldn’t lie toyou. Because he respected you and me.”

“He’s not good enough for you, Caitlin,” Maddox yells back, and his anger is visceral. It’s a living, breathing thing. “He’s fucked every woman he’s ever met. Callen’s a whore. You deserve better.”

“It’s not like you’re a saint, big brother.” Disdain floods my words. “None of us are. Here’s the thing though—you called this man your best friend. But have you been paying attention? Because I have, and he’s never—and I do meannot ever—brought a woman back to the condo since the day I moved in. Not once. He wasn’t whoring around. Not at the bar. Not at the house. I saw it.I felt it.For four fucking years,” I scream at the top of my lungs, hysterical. “Four years, he wouldn’t make a move. It wasn’t until I pushed him that he finally caved.” My mother moves behind me, laying a hand on my back. “Four. Years. Maddox.”

“Caitlin,” Mom says coolly. “You’ve got to calm down. It’s not good for the baby. They told you to relax. This isn’t taking it easy.”

I shake my head, never taking my eyes off Maddox or the way he stands his ground.

“You fucked up,” I hiss. “You fucked up with him, and you fucked up with me.”

Maddox finally breaks. He seethes, but there’s a change in his eyes.

There’s a pain that wasn’t there a minute ago.

The mask falls.

“How could you, Cait? He’s Callen,” Maddox yells at me, and Rome moves between us. Maybe to protect me—or maybe to protect Maddox from me.

Tears burn the backs of my eyes as a sob bubbles up my throat, and I throw his words back in his face. “How couldyou? He’s Callen.” I let that jab hit as hard as it was intended. “He’s the boy you grew up with. The man you’ve roomed with. The one you trusted with your life. The one who spent a lifetime earning that trust. The only man I’ve ever loved. And you just hit him.”

Maddox rocks on his feet.

“He’s Callen,” I sob, suffocating, and step back, looking around until I find Callen, needing him to save me one more time, even if I hate myself a little for it. “I still hate you, but I’ve got nowhere else to go. Can I go home with you?”

He holds his hand out without a word, but I move around him to the front door, refusing to take it.

“Are you sure you want to go with him?” Mom asks as Declan quietly goes outside, but Callen stands here, holding the door for me.

“I love you, Mom, but I can’t stay here, and I don’t want to go home where Maddox will be.”

“Caitlin,” Dad interrupts. “We don’t know what happened today. I don’t think you should leave. This house is safe.”

“We have two very different definitions ofsafe, Daddy.”

This must be what shock feels like—because I don’t feel a thing as I walk away.

CAITLIN

She is both hellfire and holy water.

Which side you get depends on one thing.

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