Page 84 of Not Mine to Keep

He came in silence, well, aside from a few light grunts and groans and a breathyfuck, but no calls to God like me.

He pulled free a moment later and helped me back upright.

I looked down at the semen-filled condom, realizing he could’ve easily impregnated me, and it was a cold slap of reality as to why we were there: Armani wanted a grandchild.

Alessandro reached for my face, startling me, and he palmed my cheek. “Nashville,” he shocked me by saying. “You want it that badly?”

I gulped and met his eyes and nodded.

His shoulders collapsed as he removed his hand from my face. “I’ll send some men ahead of time to check out the club and ensure it can be secured. If so, we stay at a hotel, not your house, tomorrow night, then we come back here Saturday. Understood?” He peeled off the condom and set it inside the wastebasket, and my eyes were glued to the marks on his back—fresh little scars all because of me.

“Wait, what?” What’d he just say?

He grabbed his pants from the floor and faced me. “I’m giving you what you want.”

“Why?” I should’ve cut and run before he could change his mind. But I was standing there, naked, emotionally and physically spent, and unable to budge.

He frowned. “My apology for what happened here tonight. For what you saw downstairs. And for losing my control.”

“I wanted you to lose control.”

“I know ... but you’ll wish I hadn’t tomorrow.”

“How do you know?” My arms crisscrossed over my chest, smashing down my breasts, an uneasiness working into my throat despite him not pushing back on Nashville.

“Because what we did tonight wasn’t the lesser of two evils,” he said in a heartbreaking tone, “and I think you know that.”

CHAPTER TWENTY-NINE

Alessandro

Whoever said new days were for fresh starts and new beginnings could go fuck themselves, because all I felt this morning was the desire to go back into the past and relive it. I’dGroundhog Daythe shit out of last night—relive those thirty minutes with Calliope in my office over and over again. I’d also keep changing how the night ended, hoping for a new outcome, one that didn’t make me feel so damn miserable, like I did now.

“Excuse me, I need to ...”Just not be here.I stood from the table inside the meeting at our family’s office building, ignoring the looks from the buttoned-up suits surrounding me, and snatched my phone. My father’s protests and concerns became background noise on my way out of the conference room.

I didn’t stop walking until I’d closed myself in my office and gone to the private bathroom. After splashing water on my face, I looked up and beyond the rivulets rolling down my face to my tired eyes.

Memories from being with Calliope in my other office last night blasted through my mind, and it was like I’d been punched in the gut,thinking about the devastated look in her eyes when I’d made her leave without me, dismissing her as if she were nothing to me.

When what scared me to death was she felt like the opposite—like she was everything. That wasn’t supposed to happen. Hell, tomorrow was only two weeks since we’d first spoken, and there I was, losing my mind over her.

I shut off the water and dried my face, then grabbed my phone from the counter, needing the only person who’d kept me sane all week. Well, hunting assholes alongside Hudson had filled in the gaps when Enzo hadn’t been on the phone with me. Enzo had become my new shrink since my regular one couldn’t know the truth of my situation.

Me:You busy?

Enzo never made me wait, minus one exception—making love to his wife.

Enzo:Going over some new recipes with the staff. You okay?

I set my back to the wall, unable to look at the mirror again, hating my reflection. I’d slept at the security office last night, then showered and changed there before heading to my regular job of helping Dad run our family’s empire.

Me:I slept in your old bedroom.

Enzo had kept his bedroom at the office for when he visited, including a bed for his daughter alongside it. For some reason, I’d found myself staring at the crib all night, unable to sleep, wondering for the first time since I’d been in the army what it’d be like to have a kid of my own—something I’d chosen to never think about after my ex left me.

Enzo:I get the feeling you’re not telling me that because you plan to complain it’s uncomfortable and I need a new one. You two get in a fight? I thought you were avoiding her. What happened?

Me:My control snapped. (In my office)

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