Page 93 of Never You

“Just give them you,” she continues. “The real you.”

I glance at her, looking at her bright golden eyes showered with kindness. My chest moves up and down as I feel my skin tingling. The world stops, forgetting everything else around me but the girl that’s worming herself deeper into my heart.

“Eyes on the road, hotshot,” Bodi calls out, and I snap my attention back in front of me as I swallow hard to push the emotion away.

“Yeah?” I say as casually as possible. “Who’s that?”

“A warm, fun, caring person.” The words leave her lips quickly, like they were already on the tip of her tongue.

The heat seems to radiate through my chest, fueling my desire to never let this girl go. My muscles relax, and I roll my shoulders, then bring my chin up with a cocky grin.

“Intimidating?” I joke, partly.

“You can be, if you want to be.”

“But not to you.”

“No, not to me.” She shakes her head.

“Why is that?”

She smirks. “I’m not easily intimidated.”

“Clearly.” I smile.

“Why is it you never give people the real you?”

“This is the—”

“Don’t give me that bullshit,” she interrupts harshly, though eyes still peer at me with an overwhelming kindness. “I’ve been with you for the last seventy-two hours, and I know that brooding NHL playing asshole is not who you are. I already told you that before, and I stick by it.”

I sigh, shrugging. “Maybe.”

A few moments pass, and I stay quiet, thinking about her question.

“You didn’t answer my question, though,” she points out, still waiting for an answer.

I guess it’s just something I’m used to. People treat me differently than they treat my brother. And they don’t treat me the same as they treat my sister either.

In my younger years, I was the maverick, the difficult one. I wasn’t bad at learning, but I wasn’t very good at it either. I didn’t want to play piano, I wanted to climb trees.

As soon as I realized I could never please my parents, I stopped trying, to an extent. I turned from the difficult one, to the feared one. The one who went through life growling and kicking, always trying to push his own way through. It only worked half of the time, but at least they’d rather leave me home when going to certain events because they couldn’t risk me roaming off. Or God forbid if I did something to damage their reputation.

Fine with me. I’d rather stay home and watch TV anyway. It didn’t take long for me to understand that showing that side of me wouldn’t make me happier, but the expectations lowered, which helped a little.

“Because it takes off the pressure if people expect less of you,” I admit with a heavy heart, a slight shame sitting in the back of my mind.

“Baby. I’m sorry.”

I don’t like that this is the first time she calls me that because I hear the pity in her voice, and I don’t want it. I’m not a good person, I know that. I can blame my parents for everything, butIwas there. I know the things I did.

“Don’t,” I say, my tone low and reserved. “I’m not some sad little kid. It is what it is.”

She glances at me, biting her lip in that cute way she does. “Okay.”

I turn my head, offering her a comforting smile, not wanting to ruin the mood.

I don’t mind her asking about my childhood, but it does feel weird, since no one ever did. Bodi did, so I told him the gist, but Rae manages to give me looks that make me want to tell her every detail of my life story. She makes me wanna share every step that led me to this.To her.