Page 80 of Forgive You

“I know. But I haven’t been good to you. And I’m sorry for that. I’m sorry I walked out on you.” There’s so much regret when his lips collide with mine again. It’s just as potent as mine, but for the first time in months, it dissolves into the evening breeze. Both our buckets of regret leveling out like a negative with a negative becoming a plus.

“I’m sorry I hurt you,” I confess, then realize there’s so much more I want to tell him. “My brother drowned when I was six.”

“What?”

My throat aches. “He tried to save me. Hedidsave me. We were on vacation at my grandparents’ lake house in Georgia.”

Chills run down my spine and I wrap my palms tighter around his neck, focusing on his blue gaze.

“We had been swimming in the lake all day. I had this pink floaty I loved with strawberries on it. A gust of wind knocked it into the lake, and I jumped in to get it. But I was tired.”

Tears swell, and I gulp.I was so tired. I knew the moment I moved my limbs that my tiny body was not capable of what I wanted to do. I’ll never forget that feeling. The lack of control in my body.

“I struggled to even get close within seconds. My brother threw his floaty in and made sure I held on to it so he could get mine for me. But the wind took it farther and farther away. He decided to come back, but it was too late. His head was going under a couple times and I tried to reach him. At some point he didn’t come up anymore.”

His thumb reaches up to swipe a tear away. “I’m so sorry, baby. It’s okay.”

“I should’ve just asked my dad to take the boat out.”

“It’s not your fault.”

“It is.” I shake my head, but he roughly cups my cheek, demanding my attention.

“Look at me. It’s not. You don’t know what would have happened if you didn’t. Chances are, your brother would’ve gone after it either way, because he’d probably slay dragons for his little sister, wouldn’t he?”

Fuck, ain’t that the truth, and dammit if that doesn’t lift the corner of my lips just a tiny bit.

“He would.”

“It’s not your fault. It was an accident.” His lips crash against mine again, filled with force, but it doesn’t take long before it turns into something more.

Something affectionate. Soft, sweet brushes of his lips against mine. Gentle. Filled with the essence of his heart of gold.

“Thank you for telling me.”

“I miss him.” I’ve never talked about my brother before.

Not even to Charlotte. But for Jason, I want to tell him everything to show him he can trust me. Or at least everything I can tell him without ruining our lives.

“I’m sorry you have to miss him, Jules. Come on, let’s call it a day.” He turns around, ambling us back to the beach.

My heart pumps a little faster, afraid he will expect me to walk out of the water any moment now, but he carries me all the way out until he gently lets my feet fall to the sand.

The warm beach literally grounds my body, relief settling in my shoulders.

I can’t believe I just did that. I was in the water!

Grateful, I breathe Jason in, happy to have faced my fear but to feel solid ground below my toes.

I don’t wanna let go, though. Idon’tlet go. I tilt my head to lock our eyes, my hands still firmly tangled around his neck.

“Thank you. For helping me.” For kissing me.

“I’d do anything for you.”

He would, wouldn’t he? I pull my lip between my teeth, then nod, letting go of the warmth of his body against mine, but not before I give him one last kiss. A kiss that says,I know. I hear you.I love you.

Panic makes my muscles jitter, creating a fog in my brain.

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