Page 13 of Forbidden You

My phone starts to buzz next to me, and I flip it over to see who it is, butterflies in my stomach springing alive, hoping it’s Bodi. But my heart stutters when I see the name on the screen, those butterflies instantly dropping dead.

Fucking motherfucking fuck.

A lump the size of a bowling ball builds in the back of my throat, and I try to swallow it away while my gaze stays fixed on my phone. My hands tremble, even though I do my best to keep them straight, which is fucking hard with dread clouding my brain.

Why is he fucking still calling me?

I thought he’d stop by now. He’d forget all about me.

Out of sight, out of mind, right? But at least once a day, I get a minor heart attack when his name lights up my phone.

Just ignore him, Kayla. He’ll give up, eventually.

I wait for the phone to stop vibrating and his name to disappear from the screen, and all the while, it feels like I’m in a fishbowl. My name is called somewhere in the distance, but it doesn’t reach me completely as I keep my focus on the device.

It’s mocking me. Taunting me. Telling me that I’ll cave, as his voice rings in my polluted mind.

‘You’re so stupid,’he says.

‘You’re nothing without me.’

‘Don’t pretend you can become anything without me.’

‘You’re such a fucking slut.’

“Kayla!” Rae snaps her fingers in front of my face, and I whip my head back up.

“What?” I ask, dazed, before I plaster a smile on my face that is fake as hell.

I really need to learn to manage this shit better.

Maybe I should start meditation or something.

She tilts her head, her brown eyes looking at me with apprehension. “Are you okay?”

Glancing down, I notice my phone has stopped ringing, his name now replaced by aone missed call.

My shoulders relax, my fake smile still in place. “Yeah, of course. It’s just someone from Stanford. Just hard now that I’m gone.”

I take a deep breath, praying she doesn’t notice my thundering heart.

“Ah.” Her hand lands on my leg. “I’m sorry, Keeks. It will get better.”

It will.

It has to.

“I know.” I push my dark thoughts away. “At least now I get to work for KPI. Who knows? Maybe it will be the best decision I ever made leaving Stanford. Thank you, Rae.”

“You’re welcome. Just don’t screw it up.”

“I won’t.”

This is a one time opportunity, and I’d be an idiot if I’d put that on the line by screwing with the boss.

4

If I could give all my money to never see Peartree Park pop onto my phone again, I’d be broke. But then again, the alternative is for them to not have any more reason to call me, and that thought isn’t much better either.

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