Page 75 of My Vows Are Sealed

“H-he started yelling a-at me, spouting a-all this st-stuff about me b-being a ha-harlot and a Jezebel,” Darla said through her tears. It seemed like she was right back in the moment, living it all over again, because she didn’t even acknowledge my mindless utterance. “I t-tried to w-walk p-past him i-into my room s-so I-I could put some clothes on, b-because I w-was still j-just wr-wrapped in a t-towel, b-but he g-grabbed me a-and threw me ag-against the wall. The t-towel f-fell, and wh-when I went to g-grab it, he k-kicked it a-away.”

I froze, tightening my hold on her so much that I actually worried it might be hurting her.

Please, God, no, I begged silently.Please.

He’d kicked the towel away. She was completely fuckingnakedand he’d actuallystoppedher from covering herself. Hewantedher that exposed and vulnerable. I didn’t even know if I wanted to hear the rest. I honestly didn’t know what I’d do if my worst fears had been realized. If his abuse had stopped just being physical and turned sexual.

“I cr-crouched d-down a-and c-curled into a b-ball,” she sobbed. “I t-tried to c-cover my-myself as much as I c-could b-because I d-didn’t want h-him s-seeing me l-like that. B-but he…he…”

She broke down in tears again, and I swallowed the lump in my throat, but I couldn’t stop tears from leaking out of my eyes too.

“Take your time, baby,” I sniffled, trying to steel myself for what I was sure was coming. “You’re safe now. He can’t hurt you anymore.”

“He d-didn’t,” she choked out. “But he a-almost did. He w-walked o-over to me a-and p-pulled me up and pr-pressed me a-against the w-wall, like th-three inches f-from my face. And I…I c-could…I could f-feel what it w-was d-doing to him, seeing m-me l-like that.”

Fuck.

For years, I’d seen how her father looked at her. Like she was a possession rather than a human being. I knew she would have told me if he’d touched her before now, and this was the first time I’d ever heard of him doing something like this. But that didn’t mean that I hadn’t lived in fear of it every single day for almost four years. And now…well, if it hadn’t happened, it had comewaytoo close for my comfort.

“Dar, did…did he…” I trailed off, unable to even bring myself to vocalize my greatest fear.

“No,” she said quickly. “He started whispering a Bible verse to me about how adulterous women think they’re not doing anything wrong, and then my mom came out and yelled at him. And I swear, it was like he was mad at her for interrupting him. H-he just…he, like, stalked toward her, and when my mom told him that I was at home all afternoon, he h-hit her so hard that sh-she stumbled into the wall. I’ve n-neverseen him hit her before, Brendan. Ever. And he started to come back toward me, but my mom started grabbing at him and pulling on his shirt and begging him to believe her that I was home and not out doing what he thought I was doing. He kept saying that I’d been showering to wash away the evidence, and my mom told him to go look at my dirty clothes in the bathroom, because she had me keep them there so I wouldn’t get the polish on the rest of the laundry. As soon as he stormed into the bathroom, I ran to my room, got dressed, and then packed a bag and came here.”

Thank You, Jesus,I prayed, sighing in relief.

Not that this was good. Not by any stretch of the imagination. This was completely fucking terrifying. What happened today would stay with Darla, in some way, for the rest of her life. But it wasn’t nearly as bad as it could have been.

“You’re safe now, baby,” I told her, pressing my lips to her forehead. “He can’t hurt you anymore.”

“I can’t…I can’t go back there, Brendan,” she bawled. “I can’t. If my mom hadn’t been there…if she hadn’t stopped him…”

She didn’t finish the sentence, but she didn’t need to. I knew all too well what would have happened if her mom hadn’t been there. Her father was a predator, in every sense of the word. When she was younger, he’d preyed on her weakness and vulnerability by hurting her physically. But now, she was a woman. Now, he saw her as a different kind of prey.

And it was because he saw her in a different light now that I knew she was right. She couldn’t go back there. But it wasn’t safe for her to stay here forever either. It was only a matter of time before he’d figure out where she was and come here looking for her. He didn’t know where I lived, but my mom did. And since my mom worshiped the ground he walked on, it wouldn’t take any coaxing at all for him to get the address from her.

“You’re not going back,” I agreed. “You’re going to stay here until we come up with a better plan, but…”

“But you and I both know this would be one of the first places he looked,” she sniffled, tightening her hold on me a little more. “And if he found me here…I honestly don’t know what he’d do once he dragged me back to the house.” She froze and her breathing picked up again, coming in short gasps as she choked on her tears. “Oh, God. I can’t…I can’t go back to church. I can’t go to any church at all. All the pastors know him. I can’t…God forgive me, I can’t.”

She broke down in tears all over again, and I pulled her as close as I could and kissed her hair.

Pastor Jones always reminded his congregation that an important part of a person’s relationship with the Lord was coming to church and “being nourished by the Word of God,” as he called it. And if he was that insistent with everyone about it, I could only imagine how much he’d drummed that idea into his daughter’s head.

Had it been weird not being able to go to church every Sunday since I’d started my job? Yeah, it had. But I’d lived. I went when I could, when I wasn’t working on a job, but that averaged out to maybe three times a month. But I still had the college Bible study guide that Peter had given me as a high school graduation gift and I still did the suggested reading every day. I still prayed every day, mostly for the sobbing girl who was clinging to me like I was her only lifeline right now. And, if anything, I felt like my relationship with God was stronger now than ever, because Iwasn’tconstantly hearing the half-truths and partial Scriptures that Darla’s father barked at everyone on a weekly basis. I was able to read the Bible and study it in the way that would help me the most.

“Baby, your relationship with God doesn’t depend on being in a building or listening to a minister twice a week,” I said. “He knows exactly what you’re going through right now. He saw what happened with your father today, and He understands why you can’t be there. I have to believe that. I know you, Dar. Your faith is stronger than that. I know you’re still going to be reading your Bible every day and doing the guided studies in your devotional book. You’re still going to pray every day. That’s more important than not being able to go sit in a building and listen to someone else read the same Bible you already own and interpret it the waytheysee fit for a few months.”

“I can’t go back. Ever,” she choked out. “Not even after I turn eighteen. Me being a year older won’t matter to him. He’ll still drag me back home.”

Oh, no, he wouldn’t. Because I was going to marry her as soon as it was legal. And it wouldn’t matter what her father had to say after that. He could try to come and drag her back home, but the only way he’d ever get her back under his roof again would be over my dead body.

“No, he won’t,” I promised. “I’m not asking you right now, because you deserve so much better than that, but I am promising you that you and I have a date at the courthouse on your eighteenth birthday. The second you’re a legal adult, we’re getting married, and then I don’t give a shit if he knows where you are or not. If he tries to come and take you after that, he’ll have to kill me first.”

“No,” she whimpered, curling up even smaller. “No.”

Damn it. I shouldn’t have said that. Especially not tonight, of all nights. She felt safe with me. I shouldn’t have ruined that by making her think about what would happen if I was gone.

“I’m a lot tougher than I look, baby,” I promised, tilting her chin up so she’d look at me. “And what you and I have together? My love for you? There’snothingthat can break that bond. There isn’t a force in the whole universe that’s powerful enough to take me away from you or make me stop loving you.”