Page 221 of Out of Bounds

I made a noise at the back of my throat.

"When I—I look back, you’re always there."

Slowly, I pushed back from her and glanced up, confused. But Kassie stared straight ahead at the wall and kept stroking me, never breaking eye contact with the drywall.

I frowned. "What do you mean?"

"You’re always there," she repeated, her voice soft. "When you say you’re going to be there, you’re there. And I think that’s second nature for you." She hesitated. "No, I know it’s just second nature. You don’t have to think about it. But I’ve never—neverhad someone like that. Ever."

My heart slowed in my chest.

"Not my parents, not my family—and I love Zariah—but not even my friends. And I—" Her eyes finally flickered down to me and her voice was thick. "You don’t know how much that means to me."

My heart pounded in my chest for a very different reason than earlier. I’d always thought of love as a separate thing, something you can shelf away to focus on something else. With Kassie, I knew better. It drummed through my body. A constant pulse change, a hit to my senses, a taste at the back of my tongue. Kassie pressed her face against my hair and I wrapped my arms around her again, breathing her in.

"That’s why I don’t care about the timing," she said simply. "I know it’s something you worry about but I don’t think about it like you do."

I didn’t say anything. I just held her tightly.

"A million things could’ve happened," she murmured. "I’m not worried about the timing. Because now I have you."

89

Kassie

In Motion

My boyfriend didn’t just need sleep. He also needed what I readily had available the entire semester - time with his friends. Time torelax. Time to stop worrying about the impending future about the corner that neither of us could do anything about.

"I’ve calculated it down to theminute," I told him in the passenger seat while he kept his hand on my thigh. "Thirty five minutes at June’s house. The moment we walk in, the clock’s ticking, and there’s an extra five minutes to account for dumb shit happening so we have a buffer zone."

"A buffer zone. I like that." Ryan chuckled, rubbing his thumb on the inside of my jeans.

I took a long look down the road and glanced at the back window. "I didn’t include…uh…parking."

"Better start the clock now."

Adam and June were co-hosting a party together at her house and the entire road was packed full of cars. Sardine packed. We had to park the next street over and we were lucky to get that with how many other people were coming in. While we walked up the driveway, Ryan wove his fingers in mine.

I double-checked my phone. "Twenty nine minutes of fun left."

"I’m already having a blast." He laughed, pulling up my hand to point out a guy heaving his guts out to a flower patch on the side of the house. "Look, that’s fun."

June’s house was full of football players and every single person in the housing committee. But we didn’t have to push past the crowd. It moved out of the way for us and the two of us walked in with a nice berth away from the craziness.

"Holy fuckingshit!" Adam yelled. "Ryan?! At aparty?"

I threw a grin up at Ryan and he grinned back at me while we came to the table surrounded by all of our friends. King, June, Zariah, and Adam were deep in a card-game, with ripped up trading cards used as chips, the free ones we got for old Romans players.

"Overdramatic asshole." I smacked Adam on the shoulder and pushed him towards King as I took the chair next to him.

"I’m here," Ryan announced, his hands up, before he took the seat on the other side of mine. "Use all the jokes out."

King took a deep breath. "It’s like seeing Sasquatch."

"Ryan-quatch," Zariah quipped.

"Ryan-crotch?" Adam demanded. "Big Z, don’t be gross."

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