Page 23 of A Book of Royals and Deities

My feet dig straight into the sand as I sense Ziven on his dragon, right before I hear the telltale flap of wings. Maeve roars, her anger only fuelling my own as Brythan lands with a thump, sending sand dust up into my face. I keep my eyes on the sea, on the waves touching my feet and how cold they are. I always imagined the sea would be warmer than it is. I don’t bother looking at Ziven as he comes and sits down next to me, his boots sinking into the sand as the waves wash against them.

“It’s not safe for you out here alone.”

I grit my teeth and dig my nails into the cold, damp sand. “Lies, on lies, on more fucking lies. I’m tired of being used byroyals and thinking for a second any of you are different!” Ziven reaches for me, but I move away. “Don’t.”

His hand lowers. “I didn’t lie to you. I couldn’t know for sure that you were entwined mates, and if you want honesty? I fucking prayed to the deities he wasn’t, because he had you.” My chest moves fast as we stare at each other. “You were around him so easily, and when we were together, you outright hated me. You were the key to getting the few people I had alive out, and I shut my mouth for them. I stayed away from you the best I could for them and convinced myself Daegan was doing the right thing. I tried again and again to convince myself that it couldn’t be true that Daegan was your mate too. I tore myself apart with the lie until I fucking believed it. It wasn’t a lie. It was a prayer to deities who set this all up in the first place.”

My voice breaks. “Did you know about the Chilgrave sickness and what Daegan was doing?”

“What about the Chilgrave sickness?” I search his confused eyes, and my shoulders drop. I don’t think I could handle being anywhere near him if he knew about it.

“Every time Daegan opens that book, that is what causes the outbreaks. The death of fae from the sickness feeds the book. It’s a payment and Daegan knows. He still opens it.”

The way Ziven goes still and pure shock registers on his face tells me enough. He really didn’t know. Ziven runs his hands over his face before meeting my eyes. “From the beginning, I knew the deities were screwing with us. Atilia suspected I was her entwined mate, and she wouldn’t drop the idea. I was not. Daegan was, and he happily used her, and it broke her. He refused to become her mate and marry. It’s not uncommon for royals to not marry who they were entwined to, even kings andqueens ignore the will of the deities in the face of duty, but they don’t usually make their entwined mate suffer by making them fall in love. That bond was not there between me and the princess, I assure you of that, but she was my friend. I liked her and trusted her.”

A wave of stupid, irrational jealousy fills my chest. Ziven doesn’t like many people, and something bothers me about him ever liking her enough to call her a friend.

“I suspected you and Daegan were linked, because of how easily you two…” He pauses. He can barely say it, and his hands clench. “Unless Daegan screamed it from dragonback, I wasn’t going to tell you something that I wasn’t sure about. As for the sickness, I didn’t know, but it doesn’t surprise me that it was something that was caused by the Sun Dynasty. I believe Hettie is the only good soul to be born of that line.”

“What happened back then to cause this hate between you both?” I know this feud between them goes back to his sister, back to Hettie, and I only have Daegan’s side, which I don’t believe now that I know Ziven. “Daegan told me his brother went into heat around your sister and they shared a night. He told me you killed his brother for it.”

“That’s not true. Not all of it.” Ziven’s voice is hoarse. I take his hand and move closer to his side, needing to touch him as he tells me. I knew it wasn’t true. “My sister was the kindest person I’ve ever known. She would spend all of her time with the animals in the greenhouse, and she loved to care for them. Everyone said she was the twin of me in looks, but I know she was every bit of my mother. They both had this kindness to their souls that made them vulnerable in this world. It was my job to protect my sister, like my father protected her and my mother.” He lifts our joint hands and closes his eyes. “I never told youabout my sister, about everything that happened, and I think it’s time you understood. Daegan’s older brother, Teritus, was a monster. A spoiled, prancing prince who got everything and anything he wanted. There were no limits, no rules when it came to him. He took what he wanted and didn’t give a shit. Then he set his eyes on my sister who he believed belonged to him and that they should marry.”

Coldness leaks into my blood as he continues. “I said no. That it was her choice who she married, and she was waiting to meet her entwined mate. Later that same day, he raped her and claimed it was because he was in heat. He brutally beat her and left my kind sister a shell of a person.” His teeth clamp down. “At first, she wouldn’t tell me about the rape, only that she had been beaten and she didn’t see who it was. The fucking bastard was bragging to anyone who would listen that he’d had her, and she broke down and told me everything.” He looks out across the sea like he can’t look at me as he tells me the next part. “That night I went and found him. I tortured him for hours for what he did to my sister before I killed him. I marked his body with the moon to make sure everyone knew.”

The rage I feel is only slightly dampened now I know Ziven got revenge for her. “Good. He didn’t deserve anything less.”

“Ruthless, my Storm,” he murmurs, kissing my knuckles. The simple way he usesmyin front of that nickname has my heart pounding like a drum. “Daegan was furious the next morning, and suddenly the new king of the Sun Dynasty. He didn’t want that. A war broke out between us, and a lot of people died because of what I did. I don’t regret killing him, he deserved it, but the war? It was messy and my people were surprised. I hadn’t been the king that they’d deserved. I hadn’t trained them, and I let my people live as they wished. My people were weakand spoiled, too. The war finally ended when Hettie was born. Daegan and I came to a truce in her name. We’d lost enough people that we felt that we were even. For the sake of the innocent baby that had been born into this bloodshed, it should be stopped. I warned him not to come anywhere near Hettie and that she would be mine to protect, along with my sister. He agreed.”

That’s why he trains them every morning. That’s why he made me train…all of it because he doesn’t want to lose anyone again. I once thought the Moon king had no heart and maybe there was just a rock, like what I suspect the moon in the night sky is made of, in his chest. I think it’s all a ruse to hide the golden heart he does have. I love that he doesn’t hide who he is from me anymore. “And then my sister got sick. I couldn’t save her, and I lost everything except for Hettie. She kept me alive, raising a toddler and then a small child. I…I admit I’d given up on wanting to live.”

My throat dries. “I felt the same. I understand why your sister became a shell, because I did too. The first time…when I lost my virginity.” I pause, barely able to get the words out. “I wanted to die more than I ever did before because I felt disgusted with myself. I wanted to tear my skin off and hope that would help with the feeling.”

Ziven cups my cheek. “Tell me you don’t feel like that anymore. The only disgusting thing ishim. Not what he did to you.”

His words ring through me, and even when I’ve said them to myself, they mean more when it’s someone else speaking them. When it’s him. “There was a time, near when I escaped, that Kyrell’s boyfriend got killed trying to save me from the queen when she stopped an escape. I watched him die, and she tortured me. She broke me with the prince.” I gulp past thefeeling of pure fear that engulfs me. “Kyrell was my Hettie. He saved my mind and then every other part of me by getting me away from him. I made a decision when I ran through the forest that I’d never be a slave again and I’d always fight. I’d try to find a future, freedom and a life. I found you.”

I can never fully read Ziven’s eyes. Maybe they are too beautiful for me to ever be able to, but right now I can see how he feels about me. Love. The simple word doesn’t seem to be enough for what lies between us; it’s too powerful and wild to be described with a single word. Tears fall down my cheeks as I stare at him with every bit of myself open to him. I don’t hide anything, any vulnerable part, nothing. He has me, completely, and I want him back.

“I’m so sorry about your sister and for all the people you lost. You were the first person I ever chose or wanted, Ziven. Even when I claimed I hated you, it wasn’t true. I wanted you and hated that it was you, the man who seemed hellbent on calling me weak or a traitor, forcing me to train and be in a dragon riding test. I wanted you, Ziv.”

“Fuck, I wanted you too. I called you those things because I felt weak for how I felt. I have never felt like this for anyone.” He tugs me to him with a growl. “I feel like I’m losing my mind when I’m near you, when you touch me or shout at me. I want anything you will give me, and I want you forever.”

“Forever is a big promise,” I whisper, clutching at him as I stare into his silver eyes. “I love you, all of you, even the parts you try to hide from me. I see it all, Ziven, and I want to be at your side too. This is more than just the bond.”

“It was always more for us, and I’m never letting you go, so I’m glad you feel that way.” He grins playfully at me and his smiletakes my breath away. “Entwined mates…being fully together like that is risky when you can’t control your powers. I want you, fuck, I want every inch of your body and soul as mine, but first you need control.”

“Spoilt sport.” I stick my tongue out at him.

“I know a very good use for that smart tongue, Storm,” his husky voice vibrates across my entire body. He goes serious for a second. “I know you’re not aware of much of what mates are, but it’s not always for love, it’s not always what we have. Sometimes, entwined mates are two people that are destined for a great impact on each other’s lives. Daegan, I hate the fucker, but there must be a reason the deities bound your soul to the Sun and Moon. Why you saw red and claimed the most powerful Twilight Dynasty royal dragon ever known. Why you have been circling the royals of this world for your entire life. Story…” He almost never uses my name, and each time he rarely does, my body comes to life for him. “We need to tell everybody about what Daegan has done with the book. The sickness took my sister and my people, but it’s killed hundreds of Sun Dynasty fae. If they knew…maybe they will see what is happening to their king.”

“You almost sound like you care,” I point out.

His lips tighten into a thin line. “You care about him, Storm. I saw it today.” So he cares too. He won’t kill him because of me. “What did the book say to you?”

“It wants the other book. Its sister, apparently.” I shiver even when it’s not that cold.

Ziven wraps his arms around me. “The princess hid it outside, somewhere in the world that’s far from here. She was the last one to have the books together. I don’t know where it is.”

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