Page 66 of Savage Fire

“It took me years, but once I had more control over the operation, I cleaned up the bordellos, only allowing high paying customers rather than the rougher, dirtier riffraff that would come in off the streets drunk. The richer clients weren’t any less rough, but they were less likely to carry disease they could pass to the women. Also, I made it a policy that all girls received quality medical care, including STI testing, vaccinations, birth control shots, and any additional testing the house madams thought the girls needed. It was nearly impossible to completely stop the kidnappings, but I did argue that while the younger ones made more money in the long run, the older ones had more experience and would therefore bring in more clients who’re willing to pay more. The ones who wanted younger girls were more likely to bring trouble with them. It took doing, but within five years, I’d made it so the Calderone bordellos were cleaner, more organized, safer, and we had much fewer incidences of violence against the workers.”

“So, what you’re saying is you think you saved those girls? That you made their lives in hell a little less scorching hot? They were still unwilling whores, Javier,” Tessa snapped.

Heaving a frustrated sigh, Fang thrust his fingers through his hair.

“Look. I was one man among hundreds. There was only so much I could do without putting a target on my back or my mother’s. Jose made sure to remind me that my mother was within reach. I don’t know if he did that to keep me in line or just to torment me—because he was a sick fuck, but my mother, her safety was always at the forefront of my mind.”

“Why didn’t you use your power to get her out of there?”

“I told you, she wanted nothing to do with the man I’d become, and by then, the only life she knew was the one she’d lived on her back. I couldn’t help her, but I could help women like her, women who were there—yes—unwillingly, but I didn’t have the power to stop the trafficking, I could only control the small part of the larger part my father controlled. You have to understand, Tessa, I did what I could with the power and resources I had. I made as little waves as possible because making my father angry was the quickest way to get dead and get replaced, and I knew that whoever replaced me would have brought down a reign of terror on those women that would break them to pieces.”

“You were the lesser of evils…but you were still evil, Javier.” She was pacing now, furiously moving from the door back toward the bed, her fists planted on her hips.Dios, she was magnificent in her fury.

Please, let her understand. Let her forgive me….

“And now you know my greatest sins. You know the man I was, the man I killed in my father’s office after I killed him. I made a deal with Jorge. He’d get me access to my father, alone, I’d pull the trigger, and he’d erase me from the Cartel like I was never there. He would take over, clean up the trafficking and sex trade, and I could go on living a life I could only dream of.”

She stopped pacing, then turned to face him, crossing her arms over her chest.

“What about your mother?” she asked, and his heart stuttered in his chest.

His mother….

His throat tight, he choked out the words. “By the time I could finally end that bastard’s life, she was already dead. Beaten to death by a client who was high as a kite. It was the catalyst, the last straw. I knew I couldn’t be the man she was ashamed of anymore; I knew I needed to become a man she could be proud to look down upon from besideel Dio. Her death triggered a series of events that brought me here, to Vegas.”

Tessa’s face softened, her eyes growing wet with a new round of tears.

“Oh, God, Javier,” she whispered, “Lo siento.” I’m sorry. She made to move toward him, hesitated, then she must have finally decided he couldn’t taint her through touch, because she sat back down beside him and allowed him to pull her against him.Dios, she felt good. Perfect.

He pressed a kiss into the crown of her head and closed his eyes.

“I knew from the bits and pieces you shared before that your past was ugly…I just had no idea how ugly it really was. But…Javier, you have to understand where I’m coming from. That was the life you were born into, and I know you didn’t have a choice when your father came to recruit you at fifteen, and I know—logically—you couldn’t justnotdo what you were ordered to do. But me, how I was raised, with the utter lack of respect toward women…this is hard for me to swallow.”

He brushed his nose over her hair, drawing in her scent, fearing that this was the last time he would drag her into his lungs, feel her warmth, the softness of her skin.

I can’t lose her.

“Mi amor…I know this is difficult to you. I never wanted you to know. Never wanted to taint your light with my dark. If I could have lived the rest of my life without ever having to remember all the bad I have done, all the lives I helped ruin, I would have. Because now that you know the depths of my sins, the chance at a life with you is so perilously thin….”

Tessa lifted her face, gazing at him, her eyes holding more sorrow and uncertainly than ever.

“Mi corazon, please…tell me what’s going on in your head. Tell me that my chance at a life of beauty with you isn’t dead. That you will forgive me one day. That you will not take your light from me,” he begged, not giving a shit how truly broken he sounded. Hewasbroken. Torn to pieces. Shattered to shards of bone and blood. Without her, he was nothing.

“Tu eres mi corazón y alma,” he rasped, his voice catching as tears began to slip from his eyes. “You are my heart and soul, Tessa. I cannot breathe without you. The thought of you walking away, of me never seeing you or kissing you or holding you again punches another hole in my chest.” Tears dropped to his shirt.

He didn’t cry. It was a sign of weakness, of vulnerability, something his father or his father’s men would have used against him. He hadn’t even cried when his mother died. But now…the dam had exploded, allowing a river of grief and helplessness to rush in.

A sob broke from Tessa’s chest.

“Javier…oh, God, Javier…. I don’t know what to do,” she cried, throwing her arms around his neck and pressing her face into his shoulder.

“Love me, just love me as I love you. Give me a chance to be the man I know I can be for you. The man who loves you, who adores and worships you. The man who would tear the world to pieces for you, if you only asked.”

She sobbed again. “I do—Idolove you, Javier, and that’s what makes this so shitty. I think I’ve loved you since the night you saved me from Madrigal. You were my guardian angel, the sexiest, cockiest, most dangerous angel I’d ever seen. And then you went beyond saving my life to saving my soul, to dragging me out of the depths of fear and anger and pain. You didn’t let me fall, you became what I needed, the man who made me laugh, made me feel safe. And in all the months since I recovered, you became a pain in the ass who never failed to make me feel beautiful. Wanted. Desired. Your teasing drove me crazy, but I secretly loved it.”

Fang chuckled. “I knew you found me irresistible,mi amor,” he smirked. He cocked an eyebrow, his eyes dancing. “It was only a matter of time before you fell for my charms.”

She slapped his chest, smiling for the first time since she’d come into the room.

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