Page 100 of Fire & Ice

“Of course, Tripp,” Leander replied good-naturedly.

But Tripp hadn’t brought up the discussion—anyof it—ever again. Not the money situation, and not the “ass-wiping” one, either. There was no lack of opportunity for him to do so—discharge planning was taken as seriously as an Olympic sport at Central, so by the time they were walking (wheeling, for Tripp) out the front doors, not a single aspect of Tripp’s continuing care was left to guesswork.

Despite that, Tripp didn’t say another word about his misgivings, just accepted things as they came and allowed Leander to cleanly step into the role of “partner and caregiver” without further protest.

As far as Leander was concerned,thatwas a win, and one he wasn’t about to question.

And so, they were discharged home to Leander’s apartment. Between the visiting nurses, the physical and occupational therapists, the follow-up doctor’s appointments,and everything that came with both transforming Leander’s space and caring for Tripp in it, the following weeks flew by. Once Beau returned from Aruba, he came over frequently. His presence allowed Leander and Tripp to have some breathing room, under the guise of grocery shopping or some other errand, creating natural space so that neither had to actually admit they needed it.

On her off-nights from work, Bri came too, and the four of them would play poker and try their best to make Tripp feel as normal as humanly possible. They’d prop his leg on an extra chair and set him up with a nonalcoholic beer, and everything would seem like usual—at least, until Tripp began to nod off against his will right there at the table. Then Beau and Bri would bid them both goodnight, pretending not to look concerned as Leander wrangled Tripp into his wheelchair and carted him off to the bathroom to get ready for bed, both of them bickering amiably about it the whole way there.

It was fine, though. Leander kept his promises to Tripp regarding going the extra mile to ensure he stayed independent, and Tripp, while frequently grumpy and miserable about his situation, tried his best not to direct those frustrations at Leander.

Most importantly, nearly every night after returning home, they slept curled together in Leander’s bed. Most frequently with Tripp on his right side, head resting on Leander’s chest. The pillows from the playroom never made their way back, journeying only from the couch to the bedroom so that Tripp could stay comfortable no matter where he might be, and Leander didn’t mind that, either.

The first time he woke to Tripp stuffing a pillow behind hisownback and another behind his legs so he could more effectively position his injured limbs over Leander’s body was abit of a shock, but the end effect was entirely nest-like and not unpleasant at all.

So they adapted. More easily than Leander might have guessed, even.

The well-wisher brigade was another thing altogether. A never-ending stream of firefighters and EMTs knocking on the door began immediately the afternoon they arrived home, and didn’t slow until well after two full weeks had passed. Only then because Reina stepped in and threatened to ban anyone who “kept Tripp from getting his rest” from her bar, and none of them could afford to drink anywhere else.

All of that said and done, Tripp wasexhaustedduring that period of time. He was still taking powerful, ‘round the clock narcotics, his various aches and pains fresh enough to keep him grumpy and uninterested in pushing his limits. For Leander and Tripp, this made things like learning each other’sromanticinterests and inclinations difficult, and for the most part, their non-platonic relationship ended up temporarily shelved.

It was for the best. Leander would be lying if he claimed he had the energy for sorting throughanyof that on top of everything else they were dealing with. At the end of any given day, all he wanted to do wassleep.While he missed the playroom and dominating in general, the drowsy, dopey kisses he and Tripp exchanged while they were both on the verge of passing out wereplentyto keep Leander satisfied for the time being.

Right around the time Reina cut off his visitors, though, Tripp also began cutting back on his medications. That left him quite a bit more alert during the day, andfarmore reminiscent of his normal self. He stopped falling asleep while binging Netflix, started grabbing Leander’s ass and winking whenever he walked by. He cracked jokes, and pushed Leander’s buttons,and was both intensely frustrating and wholly charming to be around. He wasTrippagain.

The newly-resurfaced but still very much the sameTrippalso didn’t pull any punches about what he wanted or what he thought he could handle. He had yet to be cleared by his doctor for sex, but that didn’t stop Tripp from asking, begging, and then eventually, attempting to bait Leander into fucking him. Not being cleared didn’t stop him from gettingpissedwhen Leander wouldn’t do it, either, and the first night Tripp spent on the couch and Leander spent alone in their bed was over that very thing.

The morning that followed the spat, Leander made Tripp an enormous stack of bacon as an apology, even though he didn’t feel that he had done anything wrong. In turn, Tripp confessed that it was his own insecurities about himself, his body, and their somewhat-stalled relationship driving him to pick a fight more than anything else.

“I think it’s very normal for there to be a learning curve in these situations,” Leander replied gently, carefully lifting Tripp’s legs and sliding onto the couch beneath them. He took Tripp’s uninjured foot between his hands and began massaging the arch until Tripp’s tense body relaxed and he laid back, staring somewhat dejectedly up at the ceiling. “I am well out of my depth here, too, Tripp. I’ve neverbeenin a ‘romantic relationship’ before, and I have no idea what I should or shouldn’t be doing.”

“Won’t catch me complaining about this,” Tripp offered, wiggling his toes.

“Yes,” Leander agreed, his tone edged with frustration. “But this—I would do this for a sub. I—sometimes when I see you, I just want to grab you and kiss you for no reason. But I have no idea whether that would be welcomed or not. Justbecause you were open to certain things as my submissive doesn’t automatically mean you’re interested outside of that context.”

Tripp was silent for a moment and then he laughed. “Well, fuck if I know how to reply to that, Lee. I mean, sometimes I’d be into that, yeah. Cuddling and touching for no reason? Hell, yeah. But sometimes I just don’t want to be touched. Gotta be honest, doesn’t happenoftenwhen it comes to you, but, you know. Sometimes.” Tripp shrugged. “It’s just how I am.”

Working his hands up Tripp’s calf, Leander nodded slowly. “It is becoming apparent to me that both of us are very bad at this. Relationships. Romantic relationships, specifically—with all of our mounting failures, I think that it’s possible we are the last two people on this planet who should be attempting one together. And yet, you are the only person I can imagine trying to do so with.”

“So you’re saying we’re a couple of dumbasses?”

Leander smiled. “Just ‘a couple’ is fine. Less dumb, less ass. But also, yes.”

“Could be a lotmoreass, if you’d let me seduce you.”

“Tripp.”

“C’mon Lee,” Tripp whined, reaching down to tug at Leander’s sleeve, encouraging him to make eye contact. “I’m busted up, not dead. I haven’t gone this long without getting off since before we started hooking up. Look, see?” Tripp opened his mouth wide and stuck out his tongue, as if that was going to prove something. “Huh? Looking good, right? No swelling. Totally good to go. You could just kneel on either side of my face, I’ll suck you off, you do the same for me, everybody wins. I mean, if youwantedto, we could even scene. Not like I need all my limbs for that, anyway.”

Hearing that remark, Leander pulled away, grabbing Tripp’s wandering hands and relocating them to his own stomach. “This is not a rejection of you,” he said bluntly. “But you’ve taken one too many narcotics if you think I’m going to scene with you while you’re still healing.”

“Lee,” Tripp complained, tossing his good arm over his eyes. “You’re killing me.”

“I will, however, promise to take you to the club downtown once your casts are off and you are cleared for strenuous activity. I’ll even let you help plan the scene. How is that?”

“Strenuous?” Tripp repeated, perking up significantly as he peeked out from underneath his arm. Because he’s Tripp, he followed that with a gesture towards his crotch, using his casted hand. “Sounds awesome, but doesn’t help me right now.”

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