Page 63 of Operation: Integrity

Some of the guests had said that learning to groom thehorses had been a supremely calming exercise. Some of them even wanted to do it daily. The sound, the motion, the calming effect it had on the horse, were all positive things and helped to relax the guest.

Sam gave her the brush, then covered her hand with his and put just enough pressure on the wide brush, showing her how to proceed. He backed off the moment she had the motion and pressure because he knew she still felt uncomfortable with touch, though she hadn’t tensed and pulled away as he’d worried she would.

“This has to be too rough for brushing under her belly or down her legs and she has mud on her legs.” Kelly stopped brushing and put her hand through the leather strap on the back.

“You’re absolutely right. The metal combs would hurt in those areas. I’ve used a stiffer cloth, a long-handled dish washing brush—if the horse has a big girth and I can’t reach very well, and I’ve also used a plastic comb made for the job. All of them work, some better than others.”

“I’m nervous about bending down to do her legs. What if she pushes me over?” Kelly gave him a nervous glance.

It was far too close in that stall. When he’d been the only one grooming, there had been plenty of room. Now, he felt like he was right on top of Kelly and there was nowhere to go to give her more space.

“You don’t have to. I’ll do that for now.” He took a step back and his spine met the feed bucket hanging in the corner.

“Sam, did I do something wrong?” She took the brush off and laid it on the top rail of the stall. “You don’t want to be near me, haven’t talked to me very much, and you evengot rid of Zeus.” She blinked rapidly, then turned away from him.

Sam let her get out of the stall then stopped her with words to avoid touching her. “Kelly, I want to be near you, but I’m trying to make you as comfortable as possible. Zeus isn’t gone permanently. He’ll be back, and better than ever. I promise. I’m sorry you miss him, but you’ll be glad for it when he returns.”

He’d heard from the training school where Zeus had gone just the day before, missing Kelly by mere hours. Zeus had gone through the screening process and had been deemed fit for the class. That had been a load off Sam’s mind. Now, he wasn’t sure what to tell Kelly. There was still a chance Zeus would come back without passing. If he didn’t, Kelly might feel guilty for the money and for what Zeus had to go through, even if neither of them were bothered. Kelly took on guilt like some people put on sweatshirts, and he didn’t want that.

“Still, I miss him.” She swiped at her nose. “Sam, I know that you and I maybe won’t ever have a typical relationship, but I want to start over. I want all the old baggage to go away. Can we forget about the miscommunication and the lies by omission and just start fresh?”

Sam gently turned her around, releasing her immediately. “Kelly, you’re forgiven. The past is the past. But I don’t want to forget it.” He touched the red wax ring on his finger. “That was the best time of my life. When I want to think about moments of happiness, those are what I draw from. We can move forward, and we don’t have to ever think about the mistakes, but let’s never forget the good things.”

Kelly blinked back tears and slowly, tentatively, stepped forward and awkwardly wrapped her armsaround him. He felt the moment she relaxed into the hug and that’s when he returned it, sure that he wouldn’t scare her or make her uncomfortable. This was going to be a tightrope walk, but maybe this was why he’d been trained. For such a time as this.

She nestled in close, and her voice was difficult to hear, muffled in his layers of coat, vest, and flannel. “For a long time, I convinced myself that my life, as it was, was normal. That I couldn’t expect anything else. This is so different, so far beyond what I’d allowed myself to believe. I never thought freedom was an option.”

“It is. And we’ll do everything in our power to make sure you never have to worry about being there again. Nathan is still behind bars in Cheyenne.”

“I know you didn’t want to talk about Viceroy, but I need to know if he’s still free.” Kelly pulled away but stayed close to him.

“They have some leads, but he vanished. They don’t even know what car he was in, because I couldn’t see what kind of car it was. I was overwhelmed with the stench down there and I didn’t have my wits about me enough to try to memorize the plate. It may have been too far away, anyway. I’m sorry.”

She shook her head. “Nothing to be sorry for. If you hadn’t followed them, no one would know both of them had gotten away together.”

Sam turned away, trying to keep a fresh thought to himself. Ramona had mentioned to Dee where her son was staying during the torture. If police could find that place, maybe they’d find Ramona and Viceroy? Unless the boy had died at some point, then that would be an unfortunate dead end. He couldn’t bring himself to wish deathon the poor child, even if his genes were a mix of two of the most evil people he’d ever known.

“What is it?” Kelly asked. “You’re avoiding me again.”

He turned back to her. “Not intentionally. I had a thought and was worried you might take my excitement the wrong way.”

She reached for his hands tentatively. As soon as he threaded his fingers in hers, she stepped toward him, tilted her head up, and gave him the softest brush of her lips across his. The touch was so brief, so soft, it was like a feather. But it was progress. A fresh start. He’d take it.

“I won’t. I hope your thought leads to something. I don’t want you to be afraid to share with me. If anything is too much, I’ll tell you. We have to trust each other and that is the first step, the bridge from the place we are to the place we want to be.” She stepped back one step. “Unless I’m completely way off base and you don’t want to start anything with me.” She turned a deep shade of red. “I assumed. Oh, no. I’m sorry.”

He gathered her close and kissed the top of her head. “You assumed correctly. If I have to share what’s on my mind, you do, too No more guessing. No trying to read each other, because you won’t be able to read anything but negative things from body cues for a while. I want to start over, Kelly. I’ve never wanted anything as much as I want that.”

She tilted her face up and kissed his chin, even with two days of growth, then laughed. “That was rougher than I was expecting.”

Her laugh made his heart soar. Her honesty and ability to say what she felt made it even lighter. “Maybe I need to shave.”

She kissed him again. “Maybe, but then again, maybe you don’t.”

For a minute, holding her was like old times, and he knew exactly why Connor had started these missions. He didn’t regret his past anymore. He’d finally had the integrity to do the right thing.

Chapter Twenty-Eight

Victoria had set up the dining room in the main house with one long table along the side, then a small selection of individual tables for people who didn’t want to sit with everyone else. Sometimes groups could mean pressure. Sam stood on a ladder leaning against the fireplace while he hung swags of fabric Lacy called bunting, whatever that was. Lacy kept telling him to move it to the right until he felt like he was going to tip the whole thing over.

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