Page 40 of Operation: Unify

“I never left, Connor. All this time, I wanted you to see that. I never left even when everyone else thought I should. I didn’t want to be your second chance mission because I am not willing to go through that again. I left because I wanted to show you once and for all that I will always come back. I will always keep in contact. I will always welcome your presence in my life. The trouble is you got so used to my presence that you never noticed. You didn’t put two and two together.”

He shook his head. “You didn’t leave because my dad stepped in and said you had to work at Wayside, or he’d kick me out.”

She slowly shook her head. “No. That’s not it at all. Do you think I would’ve stayed just because he wanted me to? Do you think I could stand to live in the room next to my husband for ten years if I didn’t want to be there, if I didn’t need to see you? Come on, Connor. You know me better than that.”

The only thing that would’ve kept her there was love. Was she telling him that she’d never stopped loving him? He cupped her cheeks and drew her face closer. He couldn’t say the words out loud yet. If he did, he risked being wrong. He’d already been wrong for ten years and that had cost both of them so much. If he was wrong now, so be it. At least he’d be happy.

Ever so slowly, he drew her into a kiss. The sun warmed the side of his face as he slowly took his time telling her with his mouth but without words how much he missed her and still cared for her. How much he wanted her back.

To his utter amazement, she still spoke his language.

After a few minutes, when he was sure he couldn’t take any more without risking saying or doing something he would regret, he ended the kiss and held her close. Her hair was soft where it blew against his cheek. This was what life was for; little moments alone where the truth could come out and clear all thecobwebs. Talking to her left him feeling like he could conquer the world, not to mention his troubles.

“You should call Wayside. There’s no telling how long we’ll be safe up here. Anyone with a good pair of binoculars could see us.”

“In that case, you’d better go sit in the truck or they’ll catch you in your P.Js.” He laughed but the idea of anyone watching her through glass was disturbing.

“I already had breakfast in them, so I guess I shouldn’t hide.” But she climbed into the truck anyway.

He opened his phone and checked the signal. Lacy had been right, this high area had great reception. He pressed Brendon’s number, and his friend answered on the second ring.

“Connor, good to hear from you.”

“Hey, how are things going? Have they caught Viceroy yet?” The court case was due to start in under two weeks. Hopefully when they caught him, they’d charge him with fleeing and contempt of court, but Connor didn’t know enough about the judicial system to guess.

“No, not yet. He’s still on the loose. Worse is the fact that sightings of him have dried up in the last two hours. No one knows where he went. He’s gone off-grid, which is scary. We can’t stay locked down forever.”

“It’s only been a day. I’d say we need to give the police time to locate him and arrest him.” And it meant he couldn’t bring Lacy back. If Viceroy was anywhere along the way and managed to catch them, he’d kill Lacy without hesitation since she’d already agreed to testify against him.

“Then I guess you’ll stay gone for longer. Everything working out? Is Lacy okay?”

Connor grinned because he couldn’t help it. “Yeah, things are starting to look up here. We just have to wait until they catch the guy who’s been after her, then we can think about what to do.”

“Take your time. No sense in going from the frying pan into the fire. We’re watching everything that dares to move around here. I’ll let you know if anything changes. Oh, your dad told me to tell you that your brothers confirmed they are coming on Christmas Day. He didn’t want that to make you hurry, but he hopes you’ll be home by then.”

Connor glanced off over the town and thought about what Lacy had said. The hurt wasn’t just because of his mother. He’d been close with his brothers before the separation, too. Some hurts were layers deep, not just a simple wound with a scar.

Chapter Fifteen

Connor was super quiet after talking with Brendon and Lacy wasn’t sure why. He’d told her that, generally, everything was fine. They just couldn’t rush back yet. While that made sense on the surface, he’d always let her into his thought process before. Now, he wasn’t telling her anything.

They’d moved from the overlook to the edge of a large city park. String lights swung in the breeze of the cool evening. There were so many bulbs that the whole area was filled with a soft glow. Quaint shops advertising Christmas gifts and ornaments lined the opposite sides of the street, forming a fence of businesses all selling Christmas from a store. One single church stood at the head of the square, its huge Gothic spires piercing the night.

She wanted to enjoy the solitude for just a moment. There was one phone call between peace and stress. Every sound that was like a phone ringing made her shoulders tense painfully. In order to stay hidden, they’d avoided getting out of the truck unless they had to. Lunch had been gas station burritos since there were also bathrooms available to take care of other necessities including changing into something besides herflannel jammies. Life out of a truck wasn’t much fun, but after running for days, at least it was boring.

Connor sat next to her, leaning against the window with his arm propped against the door. He’d fallen asleep a few times, but she couldn’t blame him for that, either. He’d been awake for nearly two days straight. They were in a shallow lull, why shouldn’t he catch a few z’s?

A four-person band started playing a mariachi version of “Away in a Manger”. She hadn’t let herself feel any of the usual joy for that time of year. She’d almost forgotten that the day they celebrate the birth of Jesus would arrive in less than a week.

Careful not to wake Connor, she got out of the truck and headed for the small group of people surrounding the band. They swayed in time with the music and a few people joined in singing. The conversation she’d had earlier with Connor lay heavily on her shoulders.

His words still stuck in her head even though she’d refuted them.You didn’t leave because my dad stepped in and said you had to work at Wayside, or he’d kick me out.All this time, he’d thought the reason she’d stayed had been a job. He’d convinced himself that she couldn’t possibly stay for him.

Thankfully, her own parents had been loving and understanding. She’d never faced what Connor had. Could she let that pain go so easily? Probably not. The words to the final verse of the song struck her deeply,Be near me, Lord Jesus, I ask You to stay close by me forever and love me I pray . . .Parents were supposed to teach children what that felt like, so they would understand, at least in some small measure, what Jesus meant. He would never leave.

No singular moment or words would heal decades of hurt. Being there when his brothers came back would be a start, but Connor needed more. How could she help him heal? Would she have to risk her heart again, knowing he could do the samething, just to prove to him that she was the real deal? She loved him. Always. Not only when the feeling worked in her favor.

A large presence stepped in at her side and for a moment, she tensed to step away until she realized it was Connor.

---