Page 15 of Operation: Chosen

He glanced toward the boys’ cabin, but none of them were outside. He hadn’t seen two of the three of them in the barns or doing anything besides tossing rocks at the dog kennel. He shortened his stride to match Ali’s as they walked between the cabins and the barn to a small fire pit area with seating. A pergola covered a few tables and created some shade from the heat.

“This is perfect,” Ali said. “I’ve looked at this spot every day, but it doesn’t look like such a nice spot to sit if you’re alone.” She took one of the seats on the opposite side of the fire pit. He wanted to keep his distance, but didn’t want her to yell and have everyone hear them, so he chose the chair to her right.

“It’s been here since I started. Our guests use it more than we do. The fire pit for the workers is about a mile down one of our trails, and usually you’d only get there by horse.”

Ali scrunched her nose. “I’ve never ridden.”

He could hardly recall the last day he hadn’t ridden. “Maybe we’ll have to take you for a ride sometime.” But that wasn’t why she’d asked him out here. There was something else. Would she tell him, or would he have to poke around and hope he guessed correctly? “What did you want to talk about?”

“Us.” She drummed her fingers on the arm of the Adirondack chair. “I think we need to talk about why I’m here and what we can do over the next two-and-a-half weeks until I go back.”

He appreciated that she wanted to talk and get things out in the open, but there was nous. He wasn’t ready to be in a friendship with her, much less a relationship that went deeper. “I think we need to discuss what happened between us before we move forward. Maybe you don’t need the explanation, but I do. Call me a wimp, but you destroyed me.”

Her lips flattened to a thin line. “It was over twenty years ago, Eric. What good is it going to do either of us to rehash and reopen old wounds? I’m not the same person I was then, and like you said, you aren’t either.”

Her stiff spine gave her away. He was treading where she was uncomfortable, which was good. He’d been uncomfortable with the way things had shaken out for over two decades. He’d had reasonable closure until she walked right back into his life like nothing had happened.

“I’m not looking back. I’m just not,” she continued. “There are a lot of good things about both of us, and I think if we simply talked about ways to reconnect, we could get past this discomfort.”

“Do I make you uncomfortable?” He wanted to stand, to feel like he had some control over the situation, but the whole mess seemed about ready to blow at any moment. His own anger was simmering, but so far completely under his control.

“I don’t need to answer that.” She turned her face from him.

Her profile was still just as beautiful as the day she’d walked away. She barely had any laugh lines by her eyes or near her mouth like so many women their age had. He wasn’t sure how she managed to look ten years younger than her age, but that wasn’t a question he was ever going to ask her. “I need to hear why you said no. I gave you everything I had, and it wasn’t enough for you. I’m not sure why you’ve suddenly decided that you want some type of relationship with me when you ended it the first time.” He wouldn’t go any further than that or he’d risk getting angry again.

“I don’t see why it should matter. Stop looking back. Like you said, we’re different now. Looking back does no good. I’m not the same person I was when you proposed. Not even a little. I’m ready to bury the hatchet. Aren’t you?”

Any other woman he knew would’ve crossed her arms and given a little pout at the direction of the conversation, but Ali didn’t. She looked him right in the eye and made it clear she was going to control this conversation, and his refusal to see her point almost seemed to energize her.

“I’m not ready,” he answered. “I can’t look at you and not see you laughing at me as I shoved my ring back in my pocket. You humiliated me, and I need to know why.”

Ali sighed and leaned forward, touching the tips of her fingers together. “Eric, I see you talking to all the men around this ranch, and I’ve seen you with those boys who came the same day I did. I’m certain that all of them have hurt you at some point. The boys threw rocks at your dogs, yet you forgave them. You talk to them. You always wanted me to be a believer and to trust in God, you wanted me to espouse all those virtues like forgiveness. Why do all of them get your forgiveness, but not me? Why do I have to jump through hoops to earn it when no one else does?”

He doubted she was a believer. She’d been vehemently against anything having to do with faith when they were together, and he doubted she would’ve started living for the Lord between then and now. But that didn’t mean he shouldn’t think about her accusation. Was he being less forgiving with her than others?

“The past has nothing to do with who we are now.” She stood from the chair and waited for his reply.

“I would argue the past has everything to do with who we are. Every situation we’ve been through has shaped us.” And he’d remained single because he couldn’t trust himself to fall for another woman who would hand his heart back to him on a platter with a knife in it. Some changes were irreversible.

“The past shapes us, directs us, but we choose how we deal with it,” she said. “You choose to keep your eyes trained on that day so long ago, when there are plenty of other days ahead.”

Maybe he needed to forgive, but she had to admit some blame in all of this. He wasn’t going to again be the only one to give in any relationship. “What about you?”

She thrust her chin forward. “What about me?”

His phone pinged, and he drew the device from his pocket. Connor had sent him an urgent text, telling him to come to the barn. “I have to go. I guess we’ll finish our talk later. Maybe then you’ll be ready to explain what or who was more important than me.”

He turned before she could reply and raced for the barn.

ChapterSeven

Eric ran to get Skyfall, wishing he knew what he was rushing into. Was something going on with the boys? Had one of the horses been injured? If so, he’d have to call up Dr. John Willis. Eric couldn’t offer much help for an injured horse. The door to the horse barn hung open like usual, and Eric headed inside.

Connor stood at the other end, holding a rope tied to one of their newest rescues in one hand and a gun in the other. Eric drew his weapon and headed over to join Connor. “What’s going on?”

“I was able to ride in and get him because he refused to go anywhere near that trailer.” He pointed to a stock trailer in the distance that Eric hadn’t noticed. Someone had broken through a portion of the fence, trying to steal horses.

“Did they get any?” Eric asked, searching for people within the riled-up knot of horses.

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