Page 115 of I Just Want to be Yours

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margot

It tookeverything in me not to replay the song as soon as it ended. It’s devastating, but there’s a beautiful longing and ache to it, too. I’m so proud of him—I’m soimpressedby him. He never ceases to surprise me in all the best ways. The fact that he’s here, the fact that he’s fighting for us, the fact that he wrote a song about me at all, let alone after we broke up. They’re all things I never imagined him doing, and I realize that even though I’ve always thought highly of him, I still wasn’t giving him enough credit.

Toward the end of our relationship, I had convinced myself I was the only one sacrificing for us. He got to be on tour, have adoring fans, and when he came home, he’d get to have me, too. It felt like an imbalance I desperately wanted to right. But the distance was a sacrifice for him, too.

“Margot.” His voice is soft and low, like a light nudge.

I blink, snapping out of my thoughts.

Jackson lets out a light laugh. “Take all the time you need, but if you don’t say something soon, I might pass out.”

His hands are wound tightly together as he leans his forearms on the kitchen counter. He’s tense again.

He’s afraid like I am.

We’re probably fearing different things, but the feeling is the same. He’s suffering because he wants this so badly, and I know exactly how that feels. Except last time, I ran from that fear. I tried to escape it only to have it catch up with me when I was vulnerable and alone in the dark.

I don’t want to be scared anymore.

I don’t want to run.

I don’t want to hide from the possibility of getting hurt.

With Jackson, it’s always felt like jumping in with both feet. Why should this be any different?

“I’m thinking . . .” Jackson lifts his head, his face neutral but his eyes clinging to hope. With a slight nod, I say, “I want to come with you.”

His piercing eyes are laser-focused on me. “Really?”

I nod, and the prickling sensation behind my eyes picks up again for a completely different reason. I’m a mess. Any emotion could probably make me cry after everything that’s happened tonight.

“I love you.” His words come out like a breath of relief—like he’s been holding them in this entire time. I don’t know if I’ll ever get used to hearing him say it. Those words coming from him is a dangerous combination that has the power to stop me in my tracks and make my knees buckle. Jackson holds my face in his hands and kisses me. The urgency behind his kiss ignites my core with an entirely new flame—one that’s hotter and brighter than anything I’ve felt before.

“Say it again,” I say in heated breaths against his lips.

Jackson lifts me off my feet, and my legs wrap around him as he carries me toward my room. “Trust me, Red. By tomorrow morning, this entire apartment is going to know just how much I love you.”

A small smile comes to my lips, but even his humor can’t shake the need building inside me. My fingers weave throughhis hair and my mouth finds his neck. I lick just below his ear before gently sinking my teeth into his earlobe. Jackson’s grip tightens, and he pushes my bedroom door open with his foot.

Lying me down on the bed beneath him, Jackson holds himself over me. The gray-blue of his eyes are almost completely swallowed by black as he looks down at me in my oversized sweater and shorts like I might as well be wearing lingerie. “You’re mine,” he says with an unmistakable hunger in his eyes.

“I’m yours,” I answer, already frantically reaching for his pants. It isn’t until I have the button undone that I hesitate. “Um.” I swallow. “Have you been with anyone since?—”

He’s already shaking his head before I finish speaking. “No.” I only have half a second to feel relieved because the next thing I know, his mouth is on mine. I hook my leg behind him to pull him closer, and his hard length gives a delicious pressure where I need it most. I writhe against him, but too quickly he’s gone. Jackson holds himself up, keeping space between us. “What about you? Did you and Braden ever . . .”

My eyes widen. “No. Nothing happened. Not with him—not with anyone.” My chest rises and falls as I nudge him closer with my leg again. “Only you. I only want you.”

Jackson wipes a hand over his mouth as he looks me up and down, his eyes darkening. “Sit up.”

I do as he says, and with more care than I expected, he pulls my sweater up and over my head.

I reach behind, having no patience to wait for whatever he’s trying to do, and unclasp my bra before tossing it on the floor a few feet away. Those eyes take me in unapologetically, lingering on my chest for a beat too long before they lift to meet my stare again.

“Lie down.”

I do, and he works to unbutton my shorts. My eyes jump from his hands working them down my legs, up to the ceiling,and back again. My rapid breathing makes it impossible to think straight, but I know I’ve never seen him like this. My body buzzes, and when he carefully slides my underwear down too, I suck in a breath.

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