Page 35 of I Just Want to be Yours

“You, my friend, are too kind.” Another puff of smoke enters and leaves her lips before she hands the joint back to me and says, “So, tell me about this girlfriend. Do you love her?”

I cough mid hit, and she bursts into laughter.

“Oh my god, you do,” she says through her relentless laughter. “You love her so much.”

“I . . .” My voice strains, and I cough again. “I don’t know.”

She snatches what’s left of the joint from my fingertips with more force than before. “Liar.”

I gape at her. “Hey, I wasn’t done with that.”

She holds it out of reach like I’m a little kid begging for a toy. “Not so fast. Friends don’t lie.”

“You’re serious?”

Her eyes widen. “Do I look like I’m joking?” She leans her head back and does a slow pull on the joint like she’s taunting me. “Everything about you screams lovesick, you know.”

What the hell makes this girl think she has me pegged so easily? I’ve known her for all of what? Eight hours? I cross my arms. “Enlighten me.”

She turns to face me in her chair. “Well, for one, you keep to yourself. You play your guitar. You come out here to . . . what? Stare at the stars?” She shakes her head. “And you didn’t give me a second glance.” She shrugs. “I knew you were either lovesick or heartbroken. I just didn’t know which.”

I force a laugh. “Maybe you’re just not my type.”

Rolling her eyes, she quips, “I’m everyone’s type.” Giving me a sideways glance, she adds, “If they’re single.” She tilts her head, considering her last words. “And sometimes if they’re not.”

I’m not sure I believe her. Even if I wasn’t with Margot, I don’t think I’d be interested. “Well, you don’t lack confidence.”

“I don’t,” she says with a determined shake of her head. “And neither should you. If you love your girlfriend, you should own it.”

“Jesus.” I rub a hand down my face. “Fine. I—” I trip on the words, my heart hammering in my chest as if I were saying it to Margot herself. Taking a sharp breath, I manage to get out, “I might love her.” The words are out, and a flash of pure panic runs over me, turning my blood to ice. I’ve never toldanyone I love Margot out loud. I have a feeling Matt and Rae know—hell, I have a feeling Margot knows. But just having the words leave my lips to this random ass girl, still leaves me feeling like my shields are cracked. Like someone knows my biggest weakness.

But Margot isn’t a weakness. If anything, she’s a strength.

“Might?” Mya’s voice cuts through my spiraling thoughts.

My hands grip the plastic armrests, and as much as I want to stop my knee from bouncing, it has a mind of its own. Is she serious? My deepest confession wasn’t good enough?

When I don’t say anything, she rolls her eyes. “Words matter. You write lyrics, you should know that.”

I scoff. “I suck at writing lyrics.”

She sighs, leaning her head back against the plastic chair so she can gaze at the night sky. “Maybe you’d be better at it if you were honest about your feelings.”

What game does she think she’s playing? I just offered her something I’ve never told anyone. The anxiety I felt moments ago warms to a simmering annoyance, and I mutter. “I love her.”

“What?” She holds her hand to her ear, leaning a little closer. “I missed that.”

My hands grip the chair tightly enough to turn my knuckles white. “I said,” I say through gritted teeth, making sure to raise my voice. “I love her.”

Mya grins. “Yeah, obviously. Nice to see you finally catch up.” Leaning over, she pats me on the knee. “See, look.” Mya hums happily and she gently sets the joint back in my hands. “Our friendship is already doing wonders for you.”

“Yeah,” I say, unconvinced. I pinch my lips around the joint, sucking in like it will somehow tether me back to solid ground.

“Is there a reason you haven’t told her yet?”

“What?”

“Well, I’m assuming by the complete freak-out you just had, you haven’t told her yet. So, why?”

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