Page 132 of Endgame

And that’s when I hear his first grunt. Nothing beats Caleb’s moans when we’re like this. They’re deep, soft sounds of pleasure, frustration and urgency. If he was doing nothing else, that alone would undo me. As his long, slow strokes start to build, I am ahead of him. He pushes inside me hard and I know.

‘Caleb…’

‘Fuck, Aari.’

He pushes harder and faster as I explode. He’s not far behind, holding my hips safely away from the edge of the kitchen island as he pours himself into me.

‘I’ve been thinking about doing that all day, Mason. You almost had me here at lunchtime. Twice. You’re just so mmmmmm!’

‘After this morning?’

‘Especially after this morning.’

He helps me up, turns me round and kisses me deeply.

‘So I was thinking, Jack’s out tonight with his mystery woman. Another loaded one, I think. Want to spend the night in the flat one last time before the sale completes?’

I’m excited to go back to the flat.

‘Maybe the three of us could sleep over?’ he says, gently stroking our bump.

‘I’d love that.’

‘Okay, but I’m not taking you out in this state, Mason. You’re covered in sweat. What have you been doing?’ Caleb smiles into our kiss and leads me upstairs into the shower with him.

Returning to the flat where all this started makes me a little nostalgic. We have a new home with new beginnings, but the last time we were here we were broken. Saying goodbye together before we move on feels right.

When Caleb unlocks the door there is a beautiful yellow glow and, as I walk in, I see that all the surfaces have been covered with candles and my favourite flowers. I spot an ice bucket with a bottle of Bollinger chilling next to two glasses as Caleb leads me into the centre of the flat.

‘It’s so beautiful.’

‘I wanted tonight to be special. I thought we could have dinner, watchTheSopranosand fall asleep on the couch.’

‘I think that’s a great idea.’

‘But before we do…’

I watch Caleb descend to one knee in the middle of the flat.

‘Ariella Mason, before you walked into my office, I couldn’t have dreamed or wished for you if I tried; because everything that made sense to me back then needed to be dismantled. And you did that. You saved me from the suffocating choke of fear, loneliness, insecurity and shame. My suffering was so familiar, I’d forgotten it was there. It’s taken a lot for us to get here, Aari. You’ve had to forgive the unforgivable in me. Love the unlovable in me. Believe the unbelievable in me. Trust me, being with you was no picnic, but that was mostly because I had a lot of growing up to do.’

‘Mostly?’ I laugh softly.

‘Yes, mostly. You know all the shit you put me through.’ Caleb chuckles. ‘But I’d go through it all again to be here, rightnow, exactly as we are. I love you, Aari. I had no idea life could be this good. I will lay down everything I have and all that I am to be the man you and our baby need me to be. I promise that I will die before anything disrupts us again. What I feel for you is beyond love. I adore you in a way that is incomprehensible to me. It is what makes me know, without a doubt, that I will provide, protect and be devoted to you and our family for the rest of my life. Ariella Mason, please will you marry me?’

I drop to my knees, move the ring out of his hand to the floor, and hold my boyfriend’s hands for the last time.

‘You saved me from the fear, loneliness, insecurity and shame too, Caleb. And when the darkness, cold and confusion of the world threatens to swallow me whole, you always reach for me and fight with all you have to set me free. There is no version of the future that I want other than one with you – because your love and dedication to our baby tells me everything about what is to come. Caleb Black, I cannot wait to be your wife.’

Caleb puts the heels of his palms to his eyes and, when I manage to gently move them away, his tear-filled eyes make mine fill too. We spend the night eating and talking about our future together as I make my half glass of champagne last for as long as possible.

We decide that sleeping on the couch might be too ambitious, so we go into my old room and sleep in my bed together for the last time.

‘I’m going to miss this place.’ Caleb sighs.

‘Maybe we can visit. What’s the new owner like?’

‘No idea. Jasper’s agent has been tight-lipped.’

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