Page 75 of Endgame

‘Fucking hell, Jack!’ Tim says, exasperated. ‘We told Ahmed we’d only take your personal effects. What else did you take?’

‘The engagement ring.’

‘You have to return it.’

‘No! It cost a fucking fortune!’

‘Tough shit. If you want it back, you’re going to have to fight her for it. If she comes back, sees it’s missing and unravels what we’ve just done – because there are cameras everywhere – you will have put Ahmed in the shit. Give it back!’ Tim is dangerously close to losing it.

‘Come on, Jack.’ I move him away from a stressed-looking Tim and return with him to the doorman. ‘We’d like to leavea couple of high-value items for Miss Gabrielli. Please can you keep these in a safe until she returns?’

He finds us a small postage box, into which we place the ring and the key.

‘Would you like to leave a note?’ he asks and Jack nods.

I watch him scrawlStay THE FUCK away from me Lou. J.with pride. I think I notice a small smile crossing Patrick the doorman’s face. Once the box is sealed, security-stamped and photographed, Patrick reaches out his hand.

‘Good luck, Jack. I hope I never see you here again.’

Jack takes it. ‘Thanks, Patrick.’

By the time we step out, Tim has pulled up in front of the building. We turn the music up, laugh, sing and celebrate in the car. We stop at my local corner shop for some beers before parking up in front of my building.

When we get in, I remove my mattress topper, then move all my clothes and personal effects from my bedroom into Ariella’s. I get clean sheets from the drying room and toss them on the bed before helping to wheel the cases in.

‘Thanks, mate,’ Jack says before pulling me and then Tim into a hug.

‘You should thank me, you’ve got the bigger room, with the better bathroom,’ I joke.

‘What’s the rent?’ Jack asks nervously.

‘Cover the bills, look after the place, fix whatever you break, buy your own sheets and invest in a new mattress topper tomorrow that you will take with you when you eventually move out. I’m not sleeping on the same bed as your swipey victims, now you’re free to do what you like. We’ll stay in Aari’s room when we visit, so don’t even think about subletting. Aari and I will be gone for a while. It’s yours for at least a year and a half. We’ll give you a six-month warning before we come back.’

‘Are you sure? I want to pay something.’

‘Ariella has refused to stop paying rent and the company pays for everything out there, so I’m good. If you feel the need to pay something, then just pay what you can afford. You should have my bank details from that twenty quid you still owe me,’ I remind him jokily.

‘Are you sure Ariella is going to be okay with this?’ Jack asks.

‘Not only will she be okay with it, if I’d done nothing she’d be fuming in that infuriatingly quiet, polite way she does when she gets annoyed.’

‘Let me guess, when you ask her what’s wrong, she says it’s nothing. When it, very scarily, is something.’ Tim laughs to himself.

‘Yes!’ I turn, surprised at him.

‘Em’s the same. Mate, stay away from anything that causes that. It’s torture.’

‘I know!’ We both howl.

We help Jack unpack, then I order us a takeaway and we open the beers in the living room.

‘So, were you serious about wanting to marry Ariella?’ Tim asks casually, prompting Jack to inhale mid-drink and choke on his beer.

‘When did this happen?’ Jack splutters.

‘Late one night, he texted Em. I think he was drunk. Em’s been looking at floral arrangements, wedding presents, flights to Singapore, dresses for her and suits for me, since. You should see the ridiculous outfits she’s considering putting Alfie in as a pageboy.’

‘I can assure you, Alfie is not going to be my pageboy, ever,’ I reassure Tim, and see the relief flood his face. ‘Alfie’s going to be my best man. I’m asking her parents at the end of the week, when work is done.’

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