Page 90 of For the Cameras

“Got you your favorite,” I said, handing him the juice. “Mango and strawberry.”

“How do you know that’s my favorite?” he asked, taking a sip. “Fuck, that’s so good.”

“You told me it was your favorite combination on the night you did trivia with me,” I said. “Remember they had a question about where mango was native to?”

“And you were the expert, saying it was from Asia,” he said, nodding. “You’re so smart. And you’re soniceto me. Why are you being so nice to me?”

I ran my fingertips along his chest. “I told you. Because I like you,” I said. “But honestly, I think I’m finally realizing what my problem has been for my whole life.”

“Too hot? Too sexy? Too desirable?”

I snorted. “No. I’ve always wondered why I was so bad socially, or so bad at flirting. But I think I’ve realized that the problem was I was too focused onmyself, and how I come off, when in reality I should have just focused on making other people feel special.”

He got a twinkle behind his eyes. “It’s working.”

“Hmm?”

“You’re making me feel special,” he said. “And I don’t know what the fuck to do with that feeling.”

It was like my world had just quietly shifted on its axis. It was subtle, but Chase had just brought to light something that my brain had been fixating on for at least a week, now.

“You don’t know what to do with it?” I asked.

He shook his head, suddenly looking more vulnerable than I’d ever seen him look. “I’m not used to it, Adam,” he said, his voice dropping to almost a whisper.

“But everyone wants you,” I said. “Who wouldn’t want you?”

“No one really wants me,” he told me, and the tone of the whole conversation shifted in an instant. “They want to have sex with me. They know I’m fun for a night out. Butme?Not so much.”

I’d realized a while ago that there was an ocean of feeling beneath Chase’s breezy exterior. But right now he was showing me that depth more than he ever had before.

“All right, calling for wide shots!” I heard the director’s voice shouting from downstairs.

“Why didn’t you tell me you felt that way?” I asked, feeling rushed, knowing that he had to get downstairs.

“Because it’s fucking terrifying,” he admitted. The look in his eyes crushed me.

I shook my head slowly. “But nothing scares you.”

He swallowed, squeezing my hand. “I wish that were true. I need to go set up this shot before Flynn sends a firing squad after me.”

I wanted more. So much more. Because that’s how Ialwaysfelt with Chase.

“Don’t go home after the work day is over,” I said to him, not caring that I sounded like I was begging. “Please stay?”

He winked at me. “Knew you wished we filmed something last night.”

I furrowed my brow. “It’s not about filming something, or about hooking up,” I said. “I want to talk to you, Chase.”

“I want to show you my appreciation for that video this morning, though,” he said as he pulled away, heading down the hall toward the stairs. “And show the rest of the followers, you know?”

Something sat wrong in my chest as I watched him barrel down the stairs back to his camera rig.

Of course I wanted to film more videos with Chase.

Of course I wanted to fuck his brains out, and have him fuck me for the first time, too. I wanted to sleep with him all the goddamn time, and I wanted his lips on mine more than I’d really ever wantedanything, if I was being honest.

But I also wanted him to open up to me.