Page 93 of Swim To Me

He’d held me too, looked after me… took my heart for his own and promised he’d look after that too.

Only now he’s broken it; ripped it apart with his bare hands and stamped all over it.

I promised myself I’d never let a man do that again, take a hold of my heart, only to shred it.

The man who called himself my dad had done that to me at the age of thirteen, giving me enough hurt to last me a lifetime. So had Daniel.

Stupidly, I’d allowed Grey to sweet talk me into hurting my heart all the same.

This is exactly what I’d been terrified of.

My stomach painfully empty, I crawl into Aurelia’s bed, needing to wrap the familiar scent of my sister around me and block out the world.

“Will you tell me what happened?”

“Pull up the internet,” I say, my voice thick. “Search for Grey Millen.”

Fingers flying over the keyboard, I know the second my sister has found what I’m looking for because of the pained noise she makes.

It’s been under my nose this entire time; Grey’s entire career and his feature in the British tabloids splayed across the internet.

How ridiculously easy to find.

“I feel so stupid, Aura.”

“Why?” She grips my arm tight, eyes flicking from left to right, taking in the words in the article.

“Because I-I’ve let him break my heart.”

Aurelia looks up from her brightly lit phone, giving me a glimpse of a stock photo of younger Grey in action. He’s standing on a podium, holding aloft a trophy of some kind, grinning madly, highlighting the dimpled smile I’ve grown so fond of. “I don’t understand—”

“He didn’t tell me, Aura. He didn’t tell me he used to a famous swimmer, that he was involved in the British press, that—”

“Did he know about Daniel?”

I nod. “I told him everything… about Dad… about Daniel and he still chose not to tell me until tonight.”

“What changed? What made him tell you?”

I shrug my shoulders, swallowing down the awful taste in my mouth. “I don’t know… I just feel so fucking stupid.”

Throwing her phone on the sheets, Aurelia tucks herself in my side, swiping her thumb over the tear tracks on my cheeks. “You don’t need too. He’s the one who should feel fucking stupid, lying and making you cry.”

I don’t know how long we sit there together in silence, huddled on her bed, the sun slowly beginning to dip behind the clouds.

When I do eventually speak, my throat clicks, feeling like I’ve swallowed a razor blade. “I’m sorry for ruining your night.”

Aura squeezes me. “You didn’t.”

“I shouldn’t have come,” I sniff, wiping my nose with the heel of my hand. I’m a mess. “I’m your big sister,you’resupposed to depend on me not the other way around.”

My little sister shakes her head, staring at me with a sour twist to her lips. “That’s one of the stupidest things to ever come out of your mouth. I can’t believe you even just let those words pass your lips… Do you really believe that?”

“I–Yes, it’s—”

“Unbelievable.”

“Aura.” A fresh wave of tears erupt. “I—”

---