Page 91 of Swim To Me

“Delilah—”

“Please.” She holds up a hand to stop me from making contact with her body. “Don’t.”

“You kept this from me…” Her voice is all sorts of choked up, lash line wet.

I lean forward, trying to make her see me even as my heart breaks into another two more pieces.

“I didn’t want to,” I say, my excuses sounding pitiful to my own ears. “I wanted to tell you, but—”

“Then why didn’t you?”

It’s a fucking good question.

One I can’t answer.

“Why didn’t you tell me, Grey?” Delilah’s eyes are definitely wet now, a stray tear escaping from the corner when she cuts her gaze away from me. Another surge of tears rolls down her cheekbone, leaving behind glossy trails, before she wipes them away angrily and focuses back on me, eyes hard. She’s waiting for an answer.

“Because you told me what happened with your ex, and I-I selfishly wanted to keep you. I really like you, Delilah. I never wanted to hurt you, or make it out like I was keeping a big secret. How could I tell you who I was knowing everything your fucking dickhead of an ex-boyfriend did to you? Everything the tabloids dragged you through just because you were his girlfriend? How was I supposed to tell you?”

“You just were!” Delilah throws up her hands, more tears escaping. “You were just supposed to tell me! It didn’t matter how much it was going to hurt me, or you, or how uncomfortable it would feel to say it out loud. You were just supposed to tell me! To be honest with me!”

“I have now. We can start afresh—”

Delilah’s wet lashes droop, two red spots appearing on her cheeks. “You were supposed to tell me before we slept together,Grey. Before I developed feelings for you. Don’t you understand that?”

“I do! I made a stupid mistake and I like you too, Delilah. I’m developing feelings for you too and they’re terrifying and I—”

“If you like me as much as you say you do…” She swallows thickly. “You would have told me the truth, Grey. You would have respected me enough to tell me the truth after I poured my heart out to you, not fuck me in the back of a car.”

Any semblance of my heart I’d been clinging to breaks into a thousand tiny pieces.

I feel like the worse person in the entire world.

Because Delilah’s right.

I should have just told her, no matter how much it could have possibly torn us apart, because now I’m in too deep… and I think so is she.

“You kept it a secret. You lied to me, Grey.”

“I didn’tlieto you. I—”

“Okay, maybe you didn’t exactly lie to me. But you didn’t tell me the truth either.”

I shake my head. “No, I didn’t.”

“You’ve broken my trust. You’ve hurt me. I gave you my body, my heart, don’t you understand how tough that was for me to do! And you’ve-you’ve just squeezed it in the palm of your hand until I’m oozing all the floor. Until I’m wrung out dry.”

I don’t answer, I can’t. All I can do is watch as Delilah stands on wobbly legs, heading for the door.

I squeeze my hands in my lap so much my skin begins to mottle white, resisting the urge to latch on and hold Delilah tight. “Gorgeous, please—”

“Don’t, Grey.” She turns on me with a look so venomous I’d never have thought Delilah was even capable of making such a face. “Don’t call me that. Don’t even think about touching me or trying to stop me from leaving. I can’t fucking believe you, Grey!This was exactly what I was afraid of happening and I stupidly thought I could trust you! I-I never thought you’d hurt me. Not ever.”

Tears fly freely from Delilah’s eyes now, coasting down past her lips, dripping from her chin.

My own lash line burns with sudden emotion, my mouth filling up with bile at the physical reaction of seeing Delilah so upset… knowing I’m the one who caused it.

“I never meant, I never—”

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