Page 42 of Doctor Enemy

I’msoreashellwhen I wake up, and crusty between the legs with dried cum. The scent of freshly brewed coffee is clinging to the air, and I realize that not only is Kurt still here, but he’s in my little kitchen with the coffee pot running.

Slowly, wincing as all of my muscles pull tight, I roll out of the bed and onto my feet. A visit to the little bathroom adjacent to my room is the first stop. I turn on the tap, using a cloth and warm water to clean myself up.

The sight of all those bruises in the mirror makes my stomach tangle into knots. The thought of having to go face Kurt does the same thing. Thankfully, I bide a bit more time by finding something soft and loose fitting to wear.

Then I step out into the living room-kitchen combo to face the music.

No one should have to do a walk of shame in their own home but that’s exactly how it feels. I creep over to the table and sit down.

Without a word, Kurt stands up, making me a cup of coffee, and then sits back down. Our fingers brush against each other when he passes me the cup. It’s stupid that something as small as that can cause my heart to skip a beat.

“How did you know how I take it?” I ask him. I’m more touched by the notion than I should be.

One of Kurt’s shoulders shrugs up. “I think that we’ve both been paying each other more attention than we wanted to let on.”

“What makes you think that I’ve been paying attention to you?” I ask.

The truth is, he’s right.

I’ve noticed that I keep one eye out for Kurt no matter where I am in the hospital, always on the lookout for him.

Kurt says, “It’s a hunch,” which I take to mean that he’s noticed me watching.

My lips purse. I sip at my coffee, trying to figure out how to take things from here. I want to blame Cara for this but that’s not fair to any of us.

I’m the one that’s been unable to see how badly I wanted Kurt to be paying attentionto me. And I’m the one that decided to take things from zero to one hundred last night.

Still, there’s one question on my mind that I can’t shake.

I ask him, bluntly, “What was that?”

Kurt raises his brows in question. “You’re the one that started it. I should be askingyouwhat was going through your head. No pleading the fifth allowed.”

Smart ass.

Not wrong, but still.

The coffee is a good excuse for me to not answer right away. Considering how sharp my tongue can be, and how quick to rise my temper is, that’s a good thing. After a few sips, I ask him, “Was that the same as all of your other one-night stands?”

“Those really bother you, huh?” Kurt says.

He sounds a little irritated that I’ve brought up his past endeavors again, but I can’t help it.

I don’t ever want to be the woman on the side again. I don’t want to be the woman that isn’t putting out enough to keep someone’s interest, that isn’t successful enough or rich enough to make sure that someone stays around.

“That’s not an answer,” I tell him.

Kurt leans forward, bracing one arm against the top of the table. He’s dressed again, his soft gray t-shirt laying gently on his firm chest. “I care for you a lot more than that.”

Not an answer.

It’snot.

Embarrassment creeps into my cheek. But stronger than that, even, is the doubt. What if this is a mistake, the same way Leon was a mistake? The same way that my mother made a mistake with my father?

It builds up in my throat, like a knot. The pressure of my concerns is so great, I can’t swallow past them.

Kurt asks, almost hesitantly, “Do you want something more than that?”

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