Page 62 of Somebody To Love

“Thanks Mr. Jackson.” Valerie’s smile widened as she took off her apron and headed out of the kitchen.

BJ took her place at the sink, grabbing the hose and a dirty plate. He pressed the handle. Intense water pressure shot off the bits of food into the sink’s garbage disposal. His subconscious called him a liar. He wasn’t back here to give his employee a break. He was back here because he was a coward.

Too scared to face his family. Too scared to face the truth.

It didn’t matter if he was in love with Penny or not. The fear of losing her overshadowed any love he felt. He didn’t know how to get past that. He was broken. Unable to love the one person in the world who deserved it the most.

She deserved better.

The truth of the matter was, he couldn’t be what she needed. Who she needed. He failed her. No matter how hard he tried to make the people he loved happy, he always came up short. He’d never be enough. And Penny…she deserved everything. Which was why he would stay here. Scrubbing the leftover bits of a delicious meal someone else happily enjoyed.

His jaw clenched as he watched the food particles swirl down the drain, falling into the darkness where they’d be ground up into mush. His heart might as well slip down there, too. Not like it was doing him any good. Who needed the damn thing anyway? All it brought was pain and uncertainty.

CHAPTER 27

“What crawled up your ass and died?”

BJ glared at his little sister. After Penny dropped her bombshell the other night, he’d spent the rest of the evening in the kitchen helping the staff. He’d been avoiding his siblings ever since. Today, he’d been running back and forth between the restaurant and the distillery, but now it was past ten. The restaurant was closed, and the tasting room wasn’t open tonight. He’d squirreled himself away in his office with a bottle of Jacks Gin.

“Something on your mind, Charlie?”

She snorted, not put off in the slightest by his gruff tone and death glare. Seeing as how he was a third of the way through the bottle, it might be more of a half-eyed glare than a stare. Anyone else would know to back off, but not his sister. No. Charlie Jackson didn’t know the meaning of the words “personal business.” She tended to mind everyone else’s but her own.

“Yeah, I’ve got payroll, the month’s supply budget, taxes, the new Dark Vamp eye shadow pallet I want but can’t justify spending sixty dollars on, and my big brother is being a grumpy sonofabitch when he’s usually a ray of frickin’ sunshine. So yes, there’s a lot on my mind. And you?”

Oh hell, no. No way was he talking to his know-it-all kid sister about what happened the other night. “I told you so’s” were Charlie’s specialties and he really didn’t need that right now. What he needed was more gin and for her to go away.

“You realize you just called mom a bitch?”

“Stop being an ass and tell me why you’re acting like Barlow ran away again.”

Barlow had been the family dog when they were kids. A beautiful black lab everyone had loved. One day he ran out into the street, chasing a rabbit—his favorite pastime—and had gotten hit by a truck. He and Ace had told Charlie and Del Barlow had run away to join the doggy circus. He never saw the point in crushing his younger siblings’ hearts. Better to let them dream of puppies balancing on balls to the cheering of crowds.

“Just…leave me alone, please.”

She stared at him, blue eyes narrowing as she shook her head. “Oh shit. You did it, didn’t you? You messed things up with Penny.”

“Leave it alone, Charlie.”

“Dammit!” Throwing her hands up in the air, she stalked up to his desk, slamming her palms on the dark pine. “I told you that the plan you guys had was stupid. Why does no one listen to me? You can’t bring sex into an equation without people getting hurt.”

“Seriously, leave it.”

“No. Not this time. I swear if, for once, one of you would listen to me, none of this—”

“This time?” he sputtered, rising from his chair. “As opposed to all the other times you butt your nose into business that is none of your concern?”

She inched closer, eyes blazing with anger. “You’re my brother. You are my concern.”

“What the hell is going on in here?” Ace’s voiced demanded.

BJ didn’t have to wonder what Ace thought seeing him and Charlie, breathing fire, faces so close all she had to do was move an inch to head-butt him. He eased back—not putting the move past her—slumping back down into his chair.

“Nothing.”

“Nothing, my ass,” his sister pushed away from the desk, brushing by Ace, who stopped her with a single hand on her arm.

“Charlie?”

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