Page 86 of Perfect Imperfections

It was a no-win situation. He should sleep on it, decide what to do in a few days. He needed to apologize, that much he knew for certain, but beyond that…He had no fucking clue what to do.

CHAPTER 30

“All right, Doll-face. Spill it.”

Ellie looked up from the bottom of the tawny mouth owl enclosure she was currently cleaning into Cam’s worried face.

“Spill what?”

“The reason you’ve been moping around ever since you got here today.” Cam sighed. “For the past few weeks, you’ve been Mary-freakin’-Sunshine around here. I swear once I even heard you giggle!”

Giggle? Ellie didn’t giggle. Snorted when she laughed too hard, wheezed if she tried to hold it in, but never giggled.

“It’s been wonderful seeing you so happy, but today it’s like you have your own personal rain cloud following you around. So fess up. What happened? Do I need to go kick Dr. Sexy’s ass?”

“No. You don’t need to do anything to Sullivan. Nothing is wrong.”

One dark red eyebrow arched. “Really? Then why haven’t I seen you look at your phone once today?”

She shrugged, using the scraper in her hand to pick up some dried feces on one of the tree branches and drop it in the bucket by her feet. “I’m at work. We’re not supposed to look at our phones while we’re on shift.”

Her friend choked out a strange sound, a mix between a laugh and a groan. “Yeah, we’re not supposed to, but that doesn’t stop most of us. You included, recently. You and your boyfriend send ridiculous animal puns back and forth all day.”

Her jaw dropped as she stared at her nosy friend. “Have you been reading my text messages?”

Cam curled her lip in insult. “What? No! You talk to yourself, and not quietly, I might add, laughing very loudly at every silly text. It’s cute, on the verge of annoying.”

“Oh…well, I’m just…trying to be more professional lately.”

Cam gave her a hard look. “Or you and Dr. Soon-to-have-my-foot-up-his-ass broke up.”

She sighed heavily. “We didn’t break up.”

Right?

They hadn’t. Sullivan never said anything about breaking up. He’d just asked her to leave after receiving bad news. Devastating news. News he needed to share with his family, with Charlotte. Not her, because she wasn’t family. She was just his girlfriend…she was still his girlfriend, right?

I wouldn’t be too sure about that. He obviously doesn’t care that much about you if he doesn’t want comfort from you in a time of crisis. That’s what loved ones are for. To lean on when times are tough. Sullivan doesn’t want or need to lean on you. Ergo, he doesn’t love you. You’re just a body to warm his bed. He doesn’t care. No one does. Why would anyone care about you when you ruin everything? His ex-wife’s death was probably karma for you barging in on his life and trying to take over the role of wife and mother. You wished her dead. You know you did. This is your fault.

No, it wasn’t!

She never wished Claire any harm. How could she when she didn’t even know the woman? And she hadn’t barged in on anything. Sullivan had invited her to dinner that first time. Charlotte invited her to her birthday party. They wanted her there. They wanted her in their lives.

Then why doesn’t he want you there now?

She didn’t know, but it wasn’t her fault. She’d done nothing wrong. The dark voice in her head could say whatever it wanted, but she knew the truth. Whatever reason Sullivan had for asking her to leave the other night had nothing to do with her.

“Hey, Ellie.” Cam’s warm hands cupped her face, pulling her in close. “Breathe, sweetie, just breathe.”

It was then she realized she’d been holding her breath. Spots danced before her eyes, her vision fading in and out. She opened her mouth and gulped in a huge breath of air, the darkness receding, her friend’s face coming into focus, concern etched on every flawless, contoured inch of it.

“That’s it, in and out.”

Cam breathed with her, taking slow breaths, which Ellie mimicked, until she finally found her voice.

“I’m okay now.”

“You sure?” Cam stared hard. “You want me to call Dr. Mitchell?”

---