Page 69 of The Night We Lost Him

“Chances to do what?”

“To fix what you get wrong.”

That hits hard. The truth of it.

“Dad said that?”

He nods. And I try to picture our father offering that up. Our father avoided weighing in on our personal lives. Which made me wonder if he was talking about Sam’s personal life, or if a little too much alcohol had him talking out loud to himself. And if that was the case, what in his own life did he think he’d gotten wrong? That he still hadn’t been able to fix?

I shake my head, not sure how to figure that out. “That doesn’t sound like Dad,” I said.

“Why do you think I remember it?”

Thirty-Four Years Ago

“You like him. I can tell.”

Cory had a new boyfriend. Liam and Rachel had run into them in front of Liam’s office building, of all places. Cory and the boyfriend were coming from a matinee of Lost in Yonkers, Neil Simon’s new play. The fact that Cory had taken him meant something. Did it mean something that he was waxing eloquent on all the reasons he hadn’t loved it? Liam had trouble focusing on what his reasons were. He had trouble focusing on anything except the boyfriend’s hand, holding Cory on her waist, holding her at the bone there.

Now, two days later, they met for lunch in Central Park. She wouldn’t tell him much.

“And he wants to get married?” Liam asked.

“No one is talking about that yet but you.”

“I thought you didn’t believe in marriage.”

“That’s not what I said. I never said that.”

“Except that you did.”

“What I said was that marriage isn’t what was going to save you and me. A legal document or what have you. The only thing that saves two people is what always saves two people.”

“Which is?”

“Showing up.”

“I show up,” he said.

“Exactly,” she said. “So what are you worried about?”

She laid back on the grass, the sun hitting her face, shining on her bare shoulders, her hair. He stared down at her.

“How can you be with someone who doesn’t like Neil Simon?”

She covered her eyes with her arm. “I could be wrong, but I think people have survived worse together.”

“Cory…” he said.

“I don’t go by Cory anymore. That’s an old nickname.”

“Okay, fine… whatever your name is,” he said.

She laughed.

“As much as I hate to admit it, he seems like a good man,” he said.

“He does not think the same about you.”

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