Page 40 of Cowboy Don't Go

She blinked and looked away. “Because . . . because it was just a kiss. A curiosity kiss.”

“Your words,” he reminded her. “Not mine.”

“And I do not need anyone in my life right now to—”

“Kinda felt for a minute like you needed that kiss.”

More like that kiss had shaken her body awake from some long, deep slumber. Even now, she could still feel the delicious tingle of it inside her. But she stumbled to her feet, cradling the puppy. “We should head back. Maybe there’s still time to get your father to his appointment.”

“That ship has sailed.” Cooper got to his feet, too, handing her Lulu’s reins. “But pretending that kiss meant nothing to you is a choice, Shay. So is not talking about it. But just so you know, before we close the subject for good, what just happened between us? A kiss like that? That isn’t something that happens often. Or ever before. For me anyway. Maybe that’s all there is to it. But I don’t think so.”

“Cooper, you have to promise me you won’t tell anyone about what happened here,” she begged. “I don’t want them to know.”

He shook his head, tossed the reins around She-Ra’s neck, and climbed into the soaked leather saddle. “Talkin’ about what happens between you and me is always gonna stay strictly between you and me. That clear?”

Great job hurting his feelings, Shay, when he only did as you asked. “Yes. Thank you.”

“Okay, then. Let’s head back.”

“Cooper—”

Pulling up the horse, he turned back to her.

“Just so you know, it’s not you. It’d be easier if it was you. But it’s not. It’s me.”

He nodded as if he didn’t believe her and nudged his mare into a trot. She cradled the puppy against her shoulder as she mounted Lulu. With a tender caress, she stroked the small puppy between the ears. “You believe me, don’t you?” The pup whined. “No? Yeah, I don’t think he does either.”

Chapter Seven

Sarah had caught Ray standing outside the barn waiting for Cooper to show. When he didn’t, Sarah took it upon herself to drive the pickup the short distance from the house in the rain and find out what he was waiting for.

“Cooper was supposed to be giving me a ride into town,” was all he told her.

“The storm must have delayed them. I can give you a ride. Where do you want to go?”

Ray demurred. “That’s unnecessary, Sarah.”

“Ray. I have to go into town anyway. Get in.”

He looked ready to balk, but she insisted, opening the door from the inside. “Get in.”

The trip into town was awkward and silent, but Sarah didn’t care. She was determined to break through this wall that Ray had erected between them. Sitting beside him in the car for the first time in more than eight years made her remember all those times they’d spent together back before everything had fallen apart.

She recalled the drive up to Flathead Lake they’d taken one Sunday when Tom was out of town on a cattle-buying trip, when they’d brought a picnic to sit beside the turquoise-blue lake for the afternoon. Ray had so much to say back then. They could talk for hours about a thousand things. She’d worried about how her older children would accept them together once she left Tom. What would happen if she walked away from the ranch? Her children’s legacy? Would Tom punish them for what she did? Did they still even want any part of the Hard Eight? Back then, Will, her oldest son had already left, rejecting ranch life entirely. Her girls were floundering. And Liam, the one who seemed tied to the land most, seemed angry or resentful most of the time after Will left.

All of these things they spoke about together. Unlike her husband, Ray had found ways to support her, calm her worries about her children. His own son, Cooper, had gone off to Harvard on a scholarship. He was clear that his future was not here in Marietta or in ranching.

Her children on the other hand, were torn between loyalty to the ranch, the family, and lives of their own choosing. She well knew that her husband had affairs during their marriage, though he never admitted to them, and she would never have confronted him about them. She was scared of Tom, though he’d never physically hurt her. It was his temper she feared. It was what had driven her firstborn, Will, away from the family for so many years. Tom had made her smaller over the years, until she nearly forgot who she was.

Until Ray.

What she and Ray once had was a close friendship, which was more than she’d had with Tom for many years. That was as far as they’d taken things. But many, many times in the years since, she’d wished she’d done things differently. Taken the leap. Followed her heart. Because in the end, it was clear that Tom knew about them anyway. Knew she’d left him emotionally already. After Ray went to prison, he worked hard to win her back, and she was too tired to fight. But underlying all of that, Sarah felt her husband hated her a little bit, too.

They pulled onto Main Street in Marietta. “You’re going to have to tell me where to take you, Ray.”

He exhaled the breath he seemed to have been holding. “I’m seeing an oncologist. At the hospital.”

She did her best not to slam on the brakes in surprise. “You changed your mind? That’s wonderful. I’ll go with you.”

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