Page 12 of Beta's Virgin Bride

“Why do you think you’re not cut out to be a mate?” I finally broke the silence.

“My…mother told me she tried to mate with my father when she found out she was pregnant with me, but she couldn’t. She said once she discovered the pleasure of sex, she couldn’t stop. She…” Ivy broke off, closed her eyes and shook her head.

“I’m not like that, Ivy.” I took her hands in mine. I’m sure my gaze was pleading with her. “I know you don’t know everything about me. I’ll tell you anything you want to know. All you have to do is ask.”

She shook her head again, one hand covering her mouth, so I started talking.

“My dad was alpha of our pack. My mom was his lover, but they never officially mated. He died when I was still a baby. My uncle took over as alpha. Told my mom he was happy to take care of her. I wasn’t included. Can’t have the previous alpha’s bastard kid around.”

“Where did your mom go?”

I smiled. “It says a lot about you that you’d ask that.” I reached out and brushed my fingers along her cheek again. “My mom stayed. She had an opportunity to acquire a position within the pack that she’d never had with my dad. She took it. She had more kids. Two boys and a girl. The oldest son is set to take his father’s place as alpha.”

“But that position is yours. Your family has to know that.”

“Bastion James and the James pack are my family. Not a woman who gave me away as if I had no meaning. Not an uncle who both feared and hated me when I was still an infant. And certainly not a pack that stood by and did nothing to prevent it. I know what it means to have someone walk away from you.”

“Cyan—”

“My heart’s been tangled up with you since the moment I saw you, woman. You think I’ll get a taste of you and head on to the next piece of ass that walks by? You’re wrong.”

“You don’t know that,” Ivy scoffed.

“The fuck I don’t!” I all but roared.

Ivy slapped a hand over my mouth. “Hush, you’ll wake up Jasmine.”

I tried to talk, but my words were muffled by her hand, so I flicked out my tongue and licked her palm. I felt the current run between us and knew from the way her nostrils flared that she felt it, too. Then her palm was gone, disappearing into her lap. Her nipples were hard, though. I didn’t miss the way they poked against her shirt as if begging for my touch, for the feel of my lips and tongue.

“I meant there’s no way you can know how you’ll feel in the future.”

“Should I remind you that I’m the insane man who took one look at you and saw my future?”

“Probably not. Besides, it’s not you I’m worried about.”

“Who the hell are you worried about then?”

Had she loved someone else? Was there another man in her life? Rowan had been a friend, but had she wanted something more? She’d said he’d been like a brother, but had that been his choice or hers?

“Were you in love with Rowan Byrd?”

“What? Where did that come from?”

“Answer the question.”

“We’ve already had this conversation. I told you he was like a brother to me.”

“Did you want more?”

“What? No!”

“Did you love him?”

“Yes, of course, I did. Like a brother. He was family, Cyan. We shared a laugh every now and then. Maybe a hug on occasion. I never slept with him. I never wanted to. I’ve never slept with anyone. I’m a virgin.”

My dick gave a huge salute to that. Virgin. It didn’t matter in the sense that I would have thought less of her or not wanted her as much if she were experienced. Nothing could do that. It mattered in ways I’d never considered. Knowing I’d be her first, her last, her always, it made me wish I could say the same to her.

Then it hit me. Her worry. Her fear. It wasn’t about me. She’d guarded her virginity out of fear. And there was one person to blame. Her mother.