Page 41 of Holding The Reins

“It won’t kill you.” I roll my eyes. “Jesus, Andrew.”

“What? They should be wiping this table down every time someone uses it. That’s how germs spread.” Imagined visions of him banging his last three secretaries come to mind. Not too worried about germs then, now was he?

“I’m going to get right down to it, CeCe. We have a life in Seattle. You can’t just run from it. I know I haven’t been… fair to you.”

I laugh. I actually laugh loud enough for Melissa White to turn and look at me from across the coffee shop.

“Andrew,” I whisper. “Fair? Seriously? Have you ever been faithful to me?”

His eyes grow wide because I’m sure he doesn’t expect me to stand up to him.

“Like ever?” I add.

“Cecilia, my job is very stressful. I shouldn’t have gone behind your back. I’ll try to be on my best behavior when you come home.”

“You’ll try? You’ll try?” He’s out of his mind.

“No one is monogamous, you’re naive if you think any men in my business don’t make mistakes or have little indiscretions from time to time.”

I roll my eyes at his lame attempt to justify his actions.

“Andrew. You don’t get it. That’s not good enough for me.”

“We have a life. We have friends. I have tickets for the Bancroft Charity Gala in two weeks, what will I say when you aren’t there with me?”

So that’s it.

“So I’m leaving you after almost eight years, ending our engagement, and you’re worried about what people will think?”

His lifeless pale blue eyes stare straight through mine like he really can’t understand why I’m making this choice to leave him as he sips his coffee.

“Well, yes of course. We have an image; don’t you care about that at all? What will Rachel and Lenora think and what did you tell the women at the shelter? Do they all know you’ve moved back here permanently to Hillbilly Haven to work where? At the Dollar General?”

Rage seeps into my bones at his rude assumption of my life here and the people in this town, not to mention that he is quite obviously playing it off like I’m on a trip and not permanently living here to the people we know in Seattle. I’m having an out of body experience looking at my old life from the outside at the moment, and I can’t believe what I put up with.

“Fuck you, Andrew,” I whisper-yell. “We’re done. I’m not coming back and I don’t give a shit what those women think, they were never my friends and Amy at the shelter knows everything. Now, I’ll ask you only once to stop being so ignorant about my family and this town or this meeting is over. You said you wanted to settle this, let’s settle it. We have to sell the condo and I need the rest of my personal belongings.”

He is seething. His ego can’t take the rejection. Andrew is used to a world where everyone bends over backwards for him and the fact that I’m pushing back leaves him frothing at the mouth. I can see it in his eyes as he speaks.

“So you’re going to stay here, Cecilia? And actually work at the Dollar General? There’s nowhere for you to even apply your degree here. They barely even have a grocery store.” He scoffs in disgust. “You’re going to give up everything I’ve given you… for this?” He waves his hands outward to showcase the coffee shop I’ve always loved.

I have so many memories here I can’t even count them and he has no idea. He’s never tried to learn about my life before him, my past. He knows nothing about me really, only that I am a good trophy to keep at his side and smile at his colleagues when he needs me to.

I lean back in my seat, done. Awakened. I deserve so much better than this.

Come at me, asshole.

“Yes, Andrew, that’s exactly what I’m going to do,” I say calmly, ignoring his insults. “Now, I’ve been looking at comparable sales on Zillow. I think we could get a million-five for the condo.” My voice is quiet and even, to show him he can’t upset me, but he isn’t listening.

If I know the look he’s wearing, he is about to become mean.

He leans back in his seat and folds his arms across his chest, a vile chuckle escapes him and I’ve never hated him more.

“You know, ever since your dad died, you’ve turned into a real frigid cunt.”

I gasp at his words and then, I see red.

The couple across from us stop talking and turn to look at us. I’m pretty sure the man staring at me works at the pharmacy and knows my mom. I lean forward but I don’t give a shit if they can hear me.

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