Page 188 of Scourged

“Well, yeah, I guess,” she said, confusion spiking in her gut. “My …” She swallowed. “My stepfather gifted me a ring on my firstdebutante. It had a small black and gold stone in the center.”

Mariah glanced down to her fingers, and Ciana watched her heave a great sigh of relief when she saw Ciana wasn’t wearing it.

“Why, Mariah? What’s happening?”

“You don’t wear it anymore?” Mariah ignored her question, glancing between Ciana’s hands and her face.

Ciana shook her head. “Not really, no. It was never my style. I wore it every day back home because my stepfather would’ve been furious if I hadn’t. But since I’ve come here, I haven’t put it back on.”

“Good. Don’t.” A strange urgency was in Mariah’s voice, a feverish light igniting behind her eyes. “I’ll explain everything when I’m back, Cee. But there is so much more going on in this kingdom than we ever knew. Just whatever you do, don’t put that ring back on. In fact, it’s probably best if you don’t even touch it until I’m back.”

Ciana nodded slowly. “Okay. I won’t. But I’m confused as shit.”

Mariah chuckled. “I know, Cee. I promise, it will make sense after I explain. Just wait a few more days for me, okay?”

Ciana nodded. “Okay. You have my word.”

Mariah gathered Ciana up into another great hug. Her scent of jasmine and cedarwood washed over her, as if lifted by a breeze. Something else stirred in her chest, something she’d been ignoring, and continued to ignore.

Too many goodbyes. Now was not the time for any nonexistent revelations.

Mariah pulled back, eyes brimming with tears. “Take care of my kingdom while I’m gone, Ciana.”

“As if she were my own, My Queen,” Ciana answered.

They separated, and with a final glance, Mariah and Andrian strode toward the waiting horses, shoulder to shoulder, looking as if they’d already spent a lifetime walking by each other’s sides. Ciana watched them go, a soft wind lifting her golden curls around her face as she again twisted her hands together.

She’d said her goodbyes. She’d made—and received—her orders. Her best friend would come back to her. And she had thepromise of the one person in that palace who loved Mariah more than she did to guarantee that.

But there was still one goodbye she had yet to make. One she didn’t particularly want to do, because she wasn’t sure she knew how.

“Second time we’re leaving you in charge, and I like it even less than last time.”

A familiar voice behind her—a voice belonging to the one she’d been dwelling on—answered all her questions. Ciana froze, then slowly turned, meeting Sebastian’s hazel gaze. He stood a few feet from her, hands crossed behind his back, the picture of the perfect Armature. He must’ve seen something on Ciana’s face because his good-natured smile faltered, and his brows furrowed.

“Not that I don’t think you’ll be wonderful. The leadership suits you, Cee. I just …” His cheeks lightly flushed. “I just don’t like all of us being separated. I need to go with my queen, but I don’t like leaving you here. Without … us.”

“Without us,” Ciana repeated, her voice quiet.

Sebastian nodded, still wearing a confused expression on his handsome face.

“Do you think all the others mind leaving me here?”

His flush grew. “Of—of course. You are a lady of the court. You’re important to Mariah, so you’re important to all of them. All of us.”

Ciana shook her head. “That wasn’t my question, Sebastian.”

Sebastian glanced away, taking a deep, heaving sigh. When he looked back at Ciana, his expression was pained.

“What do you want me to say? ThatI’mthe one who doesn’t like leaving you here? That I can’t stand the thought of leaving you alone in this palace without me?” He choked on a bitter laugh, running a hand through his hair. “What good would that do any of us?”

Ciana wasn’t sure her heart was beating. Her lungs froze in her chest, tightening as if the weight of a thousand bricks had landed there. Her hands had stopped wringing together, now just clasped in front of her, knuckles white.

“What good would it do?” she whispered, taking a step closer to him. “Sebastian … Mariah is the reason I chose this palace as my new home, but you …youare the reason I stayed. You reminded me that no matter what terrible men had done to me, I still hadme. That after all they’d taken from me, they could never take that. I still had choices I could make for myself. I could stillchoose.” Her voice broke at the end, more tears welling in her eyes.

“And, Seb, despite everything we have working against us, despite your bond and my past and the Royals and everything … I would stillchoose you. Every single time.” She hung her head, staring at the cobblestones beneath her feet. “I just … needed you to know that. Just once.”

Silence passed between them, a stillness shared only in the microcosm that existed in those few feet of the palace courtyard.