Page 44 of Threaded

And so she did.

She told Sebastian about Ellan and how much he both amused and annoyed her; the way fire burned in his veins but did little to temper his soft kindness. She told him about Wex, the father who’d raised her, trained her, and taught her to never let this kingdom or its people change who she was. And she told him about Lisabel, the mother who carried herself with such a strong, steady grace, but hid so many secrets behind her eyes Mariah had never quite been able to tease out.

“She gave me this … book. The night before I received the summons from Ryenne for the Choosing,” Mariah said. “My father told me she’d known I wouldn’t be walking out of the palace after the Choosing. I tried to read some of it last night, but … it was gibberish. Nonsensical. And yet, I can’t shake this feeling that I’m missing something. My mother told me the book would help me when I felt lost, but I can’t possibly seehow.” She sighed. “And because of that, I feel as if I’m … failing my mother somehow. I know I’m not, but that thought is still there, lingering in the back of my mind, pestering me that if she knew I hadn’t figured out her gift yet, she would be disappointed. Inme.”

Mariah hadn’t noticed that tears had welled up in her eyes and spilled over onto her cheeks. Not until Sebastian reached a hand up, sweeping a rough pad across her skin, smearing the tracks of moisture dripping down onto the green of her gown. She darted her gaze back to his, and he smiled gently down at her, soft smile lines wrinkling around the corners of his eyes.

He was so kind, so gentle, so beautiful. She could lose herself in that easy smile.

“There’s no chance that she’s disappointed in you,” Sebastian said. “I don’t know her, but I can’t imagine how proud of you she must be.” He paused before continuing. “But…if you are convinced there is more to that book than meets the eye, and if you ever want help searching for it, I am at your disposal.” His grin widened then. “I’m sure the other guys will bring this up eventually in a way meant to be to my detriment, but I do consider myself to be quite an avid reader. The palace library has long been my favorite place in the city since the day I moved here.”

Mariah couldn’t stop her answering grin. “I didn’t take you for the bookish type, but now knowing that, I absolutely see it.”

Sebastian let loose a chuckle, low and warm. The sound melted her chest, chasing away the last lingering remnants of that cold darkness. He’d demonstrated such devotion today, such steadfast support despite what she’d done, without even truly knowing her at all …

Before she could let herself think too much about it, she leaned into him further, twisting her body so she leaned fully against his side. She nestled her cheek into his shoulder, breathing in his clean scent, his warmth, her head resting against the hollow of his neck. His arm, as if on instinct, instantly circled around her, clutching her shoulder and holding her close.

“Tell me about you. Please.” Mariah felt Sebastian shift beneath her at her request, his head turning to meet her gaze. She smiled up at him. “I want to know more about the well-read boy who came to be Marked, left his home for the capital, and now serves a homesick, unstable queen.” She felt another chuckle rumble through him and couldn’t stop her eyes from closing, just for a moment. She inhaled another breath of his clean scent, noting there was something else beneath it; something that reminded her of worn leather, of ink on parchment, of nights spent around a hearth lost in the magic of written words.

Which was odd, since she’d never once had a night like that in her life.

“While today was certainly a … challenge, you are far from unstable, Mariah.” She felt him tense, just slightly. “I, for one, am glad you made clear to those lords that—”

“I don’t want to talk about that,” Mariah interrupted him. “I want to hear about you.”

Sebastian paused for a moment, still tense, before exhaling, relaxing with his breath. He didn’t apologize—she wouldn’t have wanted that, anyway—before he spoke again, obliging her request.

“I was born in Sacale, the first-born son to a family of successful merchants, our wealth attributable to old money that has long been maintained by connections with the fickle spice traders of the Kizar Islands. Much like you, I love my family. My parents were kind and doting, my father the ideal man for me to learn from, my mother as kind and compassionate as the Goddess herself.

“I was three years old when Matheo was born, and our childhood was filled with about as much chaos and fun as you could expect from two brothers so close in age who were growing up in obnoxious wealth without the expectations of being a lord or Royal. He was always wilder than me, though. On some days, he would want to go on some tryst around the grounds of our family’s estate, desperate for an adventure. But even at a young age, I only wanted to stay in our family library, reading dusty books about the swashbuckling pirates who’d founded Sacale so long ago, the same pirates my father told me we were descended from.” Sebastian paused, and Mariah glanced up to see a soft smile on his lips. “It seemed that while Matheo sought to write his own stories, I was content to simply read them. We grew apart because of it, for a time.”

So, Matheo is his brother. Mariah had noticed how alike they looked, but she couldn’t deny her curiosity. What were the odds the Goddess chose two Marked brothers to serve in her Armature?

Sebastian continued. “But then … the Mark appeared.” He halted his speech again, something unsaid in his silence. Mariah felt him shift, his movement almost hesitant as he moved his arm from her shoulder to her upper back, his fingers curling through the ends of her dark hair. Mariah let her eyes drift back shut, the steady movement and the rumble of his voice in his chest nearly enough to rock her to sleep.

“I’m not sure how much you know about how we come to be Marked, but it appears when our queen apparent is born. I was ten; Matheo was seven.”

Mariah stilled, her eyes flying open, all thoughts of sleep vanishing like smoke.

She hadn’t realized howyoungthey all were. Not now, but when that Mark had appeared on their bodies, when they’d been forced away from their families to a strange city, to serve a queen they would have to wait over two decades to know.

At the same time, she also was struck with the other piece of information he’d shared: Sebastian had been ten when she’d beenborn.I did not realize they were so much older than me, she thought. She guessed it must be for the strength and maturity that no amount of training could instill, especially when it came to men.

“We were terrified to tell our parents, of course,” Sebastian went on; if he was aware of Mariah’s sudden alertness to his words, he didn’t reveal it. “Not only had one of us been Marked, butbothof their sons, the futures of their family … we didn’t know how to tell them. But we knew we had to—tell them, that is. Even as boys, we knew this wasn’t something that could or should be hidden from the world.

“So at dinner that night, with the autumn breeze blowing in from the windows in our house along the coast, we broke the news, hoping the fine weather and good food would serve as a peace offering to the blow we were about to land.”

Mariah wasn’t sure if she’d drawn a breath in several minutes. She again tilted her head back to look at his face, but instead of the pain she’d expected to find there, she found him smiling back down at her, his hazel eyes warm with the memory.

“I don’t know why we were ever nervous. Our parents … they were ecstatic. Not only had one of their sons been blessed with the honor of the gods to serve a new queen, they had said, butbothof them were deemed worthy. They told us they could imagine no better future for their sons than the one we were given.” His smile grew even wider, warmth permeating every inch of his handsome face. “So, they packed us up and escorted us to Verith, all the way to the palace gates, and here we’ve lived ever since. They visit us from time to time, and of course Ryenne has always been a gracious hostess. I miss them, but the assurances they gave Matheo and me that this was the path we’d always been meant to walk … it has made the distance easier. And it makes serving you feel like the greatest gift I could’ve ever been blessed with.”

Mariah knew she was crying again, but she didn’t care. She reached up with a free hand, wiping away her tears with a messy sniffle. Suddenly, she was struck with an idea—an idea that shocked her with how perfect it was, something she wanted to slap herself for not seeing and asking earlier. She sat back suddenly, meeting Sebastian’s stare head on. He blinked in surprise, his lips parted slightly as he watched her.

“Bond with me. Next week. You should be the first.”

Sebastian’s surprise morphed into pure shock. “Mariah—are you sure? The first bond…it can be intense. It’s always the most vulnerable. I don’t—”

“Exactly. It’s the most vulnerable. And you just saw me cry my eyes out. Do you know how many people, outside of my family, have seen me cry?” Sebastian didn’t answer her, only stared at her with wide eyes. She continued, “None. No one outside of my family, except for you, has ever seen me cry. So if I have to go through avulnerableceremony with someone for the first time, a ritual that might rattle my entire worldview, I want it to be you.”

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