Page 104 of Death is My Ride or Die

“I most certainly donothave high gums,” Duncan insisted.

“Okay, but you definitely have something between your teeth,” I said.

Duncan prodded at his teeth with his pinky. “I do? Where?”

I moved toward him. “Right . . . there!” I smashed the book in my hands into his pale face. His hand shot out toward me, but I dodged left and whipped out a set of handcuffs from my bag and snapped them around the vampire’s wrist. The device spiraled up his arm like a snake and constricted. Duncan reeled back with a hiss, his arm limp at his side. Death kicked his boot into Duncan’s side and knocked him into a bookshelf. Books tumbled off the shelf and onto the floor. Death threw his whole weight onto the vampire, slammed him into the ground, and wedged his knee between his shoulder blades. I scrambled to gather his wrists together and cuffed them together behind his back.

Duncan hissed, his facial features sharpening unnaturally. “Get off of me, you wanker!”

Death stood with his boot pressed against the vampire’s spine. “Shut the hell up,” he snarled. Then he cut his stare to me. I smirked.

I held out my arms as I rose to my feet. “Amazing, aren’t I?”

Death ripped down his hood. His mismatched eyes held mine. I expected him to rip into me with his words, to chastise me for attacking a master vampire.

Death bowed his head at me, an oddly intimate, unexpected acknowledgement of respect. I felt all warm inside, like I’d achieved a pivotal moment.

“You can’t do shit to me, mate!” Duncan shouted, writhing on the ground like a big baby. “I’m an affiliate of Lucifer’s comity! I’m a pure-blooded vampire, and you’re a bloody bastard question mark. You don’t deserve your position in Hell, you good-for-nothing mutt!”

Death smashed his boot onto Duncan’s arm. Bones crunched. The vampire released a comically high-pitched wail.

“What is going on here?”

Death and I turned our heads to find Ace standing at the end of the towering aisle of books. His magenta alligator-skin shoes clacked against the marble floor as he strutted to the ticking of an old clock resounding through the spacious library.

“Unbelievable,” Ace said, stopping before us to lean on his cane. “Why is Master Vampire Duncan hog-tied in my library like a Christmas ham?”

Death crossed his muscular arms, silent.

“He doggy-ears his book pages,” I blurted, earning a look of confusion from everyone, including Duncan. “What? It should be a crime.”

“They ganged up on me!” Duncan snarled. “That crazy bitch hit me with a giant book!”

“Aw, did the poor little baby get a boo-boo from the mean girl?” Death leaned against a bookshelf as he dug into his pocket.

Duncan’s fangs lengthened. “You wait until I’m free, you bloody repulsivething!”

With a crinkle of plastic, Death popped a piece of blue candy into his mouth. “I’m quaking.”

Ace raked a hand aggressively through his hair. “Why is it everywhere you two go,” he said, splitting his attention between us, “une tornadeof chaos follows? You could have handled thisoutsideof my store. These books are invaluable, hundreds of years old. Also, if you had listened to me when you were here earlier, Death, you would have known to knock thrice on the door before entering instead of completely demolishing my ward.”

“Why isn’t anyone freeing me?” Duncan thrashed on the floor. He managed to knock a book off a shelf, and it thumped right onto his head.“Arghhh!”

Death rested his boot on the vamp’s throat. “One more sound out of you and I’m sticking your goddamn head on a wooden peg and feeding it to my hounds.”

“What Death means to say,” I said to Ace, “is we apologize. We’re both a little volatile with all the stress. I also want to say how sorry I am about your séance room. I hope you and Trixie are okay after the—er—the accident. I feel really bad about what happened.”

When Death remained silent beside me, distracted by a ribbon hanging out of a book with a bead at the end of it, I nudged his side. “What she said,” he growled.

Ace cleared his throat. “I appreciate your apology,ma chérie. Trixie is already recovered. I’m glad to see you are in good health too. The last time I saw you, you were certainty not yourself . . . ” His violet eyes lingered on the pendant around my throat. “How is the barracuda treating you today?”

“I haven’t noticed anything strange.” I touched the pendant with my fingertips. “I think it might be working.”

“Placebos do tend to work on weaker minds,” Death muttered, and I shot him a look.

“I’ve been an associate of Lucifer for more than three hundred years,” Duncan seethed, “and this inbred Venom wannabe and his stupid big-bosomed slag dishonored my entire clan! Now the tattooed delinquent with daddy issues is threatening me on neutral ground, and nobody is doing anything about it? I am a pureblood! I am an immigrant of the Netherworld! I will not stand for this—”

Ace snapped his fingers, and suddenly Duncan had a wad of cloth in his mouth. “Quel emmerdeur!Does he ever shut up?”

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