Page 56 of Death is My Ride or Die

“Thewhat?”

Glenn pushed his glasses up his nose. “Oh, apologies. It’s an obstacle course he created for you. Located in another gym in this building. He calls it the Graveyard.”

Just one day of navigating the Graveyard and I felt like I’d dropped thirty pounds. After just a few rounds of tire jumps, sprints, cone drills, and bodyweight training, I was flat on the mat with my mouth open as I wheezed like a fish out of water.

A shadow appeared, haloed in the light of the ceiling as Death’s upside-down face loomed over me. “On your back for me again, cupcake?”

He circled around me once, letting out a low purring noise as if he’d discovered his prey sleeping soundly with no way to escape. Dark aviators shielded his eyes, but I could tell he was livelier andfullerthan usual by the golden-bronze tint of his skin.

“Just taking a quick nap with my eyes open,” I said. “Back from pawing at your ball of yarn and coughing up hairballs?”

Death slapped his combat boots on either side of my body and grinned down at me with those pearly white fangs. Then he lowered himself to a low squat, balancing on the balls of his feet. He had fantastic hip mobility.What a weird, weirdthing to think.

“You think you’re cute, don’t you?” Death asked.

“I know I’m cute.” I smirked.

“Tomorrow, you trainwithme,” he said. “I won’t be going easy on you.”

I sat up on my forearms and felt my shoulders shake with the small movement. “I don’t recall asking for you to go easy on me.”

Death’s lip lifted in a snarl, as if he were frustrated that his bullying hadn’t worked. Surprisingly, that frustration transitioned into something else. And he looked almost . . . impressed.

“Hmm,” Death said. He rose to his feet and stalked away. “Peel your swamp ass off my mats, cupcake. Class is dismissed.”

“I’ll bring catnip tomorrow in case you get tired!” I called after him. I could have sworn I heard Death laugh as his darkness devoured him and he left again.

XVII

The rest of the day came and went with the excitement of finally trainingwithDeath. I imagined we’d go right into hand-to-hand combat, which was what I’d been looking forward to all along. If there was anything I trusted Death with after seeing him fight in the gladiator arena and in the alleyway against Malphas’s underlings, it was hand-to-hand combat.

Unfortunately, the training session began like any other. Except this time, he was alongside me, performing the exercises too, or directly in my face, coaching every step of the way.

“Faster.”

“Pull your knees up higher, so they’re aligned with your hips.”

“Again!”

“You knock over a cone, you pick it back up, and you start over!”

“Fist up, head tilted down. Protect your face at all times.”

“Are younapping?”

“I don’t know what that was, but it certainly wasn’t agoddamn push-up!”

My back hit the mat with a cringe-worthy wet slap.

This whole “proving myself” thing had spiraled out of control.

“I am absolutely blown away,” Death seethed, still in full critical-coach mode, “that you made it halfway through the Graveyard yesterday.”

“Actually, I made it one-fourth of the way through,” I corrected snootily. In my defense, the Graveyard looked like something straight out of Ninja Warriors or a boot camp, with its monster tires, swinging spikes, ladders, ropes, and a warped wall. It was a miracle I hadn’t just keeled over at the beginning.

“Glenn was gracious to you, then,” Death said. “He told me you made it halfway through. One-fourth is absolutely fucking pathetic.”

I pulled my aching body up so that I leaned on my forearms. “I’m so glad you accept me for who I am. Please, tell me everything you feel!”

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