Page 11 of Footlights and Forever

“Maybe you should have thought of that before you went all Bruce Banner on Garrett when he said you were my boyfriend.” I narrowed my eyes, daring him to deny it.

“Dylan, it’s not what you think. I just didn’t…”

“I know what youjust didn’t,Austin.” My lips curled into a tight smile. “It’s cool. You won’t have to worry about any misconceptions anymore. It’s been nice.”

His face fell. He looked like he wanted to say something, but the words got caught in his chest. I nodded mutely before turning around and left with Hailey in tow.

Chapter 5

“We explain when someone is cruel or acts like a bully, you do not stoop to their level. Our motto is when they go low, you go high.” ? Michelle Obama

Dylan

Ikept my head lowered as I walked into the classroom. The whispers started the second my footsteps fell on the grey and black linoleum floor. I gave a brief smile to the Physics teacher, Mr. Dunne, as I made my way down the center aisle towards my usual seat at the very back of the lab. I tried to avoid the stares and glances aimed my way from the rest of the class, who were already seated. I slipped quietly into my seat, slinging my bag under the table. I hoped to god that no one asked me any questions, and that I could just finish this day with some semblance of dignity. Okay, so yes, everyone in the class was sneaking looks at me after word had gotten out about what happened in the cafeteria at lunchtime. I didn’t even have Hailey in my final period as a buffer for the hushed conversations that included my name every few seconds.

“Okay class, I hope you did the assigned reading for today’s lesson because we don’t have any time to go over it today.” Mr. Dunne slid into his own seat, pulling out a giant textbook from the desk drawer and slamming it on the table in front of him. “We are going to be looking into the intrinsic electrical properties of mammalian neurons and their conductive nature.”

“Sorry sir,”Not again! “I haven’t done the reading, but I see my friend in the back there. Is it okay if I sit with him so I can catch up easier?”

My eyes snapped up to glare at Austin as he walked confidently towards Mr. Dunne’s desk from the doorway. “I think that’s probably a good idea Austin. Also, please ensure that you do the assigned reading by the end of this evening as I would hate to fail you in my class.”

“Absolutely sir, I’ll just go take my seat.” He gestured over his shoulder to my desk. I pinned him with a sharp stare as he walked towards the back of the class. He rested his bag on top of mine and moved behind me towards the empty seat. “I’m just here so you can teach me,” he leaned down and whispered in my ear as he passed, his chest sliding against my back. I bit back a groan as his heat scalded me through my t-shirt. His hand gripped my shoulder as he sat in the seat next to me.

“What do you think you are doing?” I forced out through clenched teeth, my eyes never straying from the front of the class.

“I told you,” he whispered, “I just want to do my best.”

I reached down and pulled my bag out from underneath his, and reaching inside, I slammed my heavy textbook down on the desk in front of him. The sound reverberated around the room. The startled teacher glared at me as I waved in apology. “Well, there you go since you’re here to learn,” I flipped the book open to the correct chapter, “start reading this.”

Austin put a hand in the center of the book, flattening it out in front of him, “See I could do that.” He chewed thoughtfully on his bottom lip. The plump flesh caught between his teeth, making me hold back another moan. “Or since you think I’m all caught up with English, maybe you can help me out with Physics?”

“Austin, what are you doing?” I turned my body to face his.

“What do you mean?”

“You know what I mean,” I sighed deeply. “I get that hanging out with me has already caused you some problems, so I’m giving you an out.”

“I don’t want an out.” His voice was barely a whisper.

“Okay, cause you could have fooled me.” I gestured around the room. “No one here is looking at us, no one is going to find out that you like hanging around with the school joke.”

Austin reared back as if I’d slapped him. He pinned me with a stare that seemed to shrink me down to the size of a gnat. “Is that what you really think of me?” He reached out, his hand coming to rest on top of mine. “Is that what you really think of yourself?”

Is that what I really think of myself?I stilled at the thought. I had always focused on what other people had thought or said about me, and had fought to build a wall, protecting myself from their opinions having any effect on me. I realized then that I had never really stopped to think what opinions lay within that wall. What opinions I held about myself.

“Come on Austin, let’s not kid ourselves.” A twisted laugh escaped me. “You wouldn’t even have known I exist unless you wanted something from me.”

“Dylan no.”

“Please just leave me alone, okay?” I pulled my hand away from his. “I think it’s for the best.”

It was that look that people give you, that pitying look that said that they were so relieved that they were still them and didn’thave the unfortunate luck of being you. I couldn’t sit under that appraising glare for a second longer. “Mr. Dunne, can I get the hall pass please?”

“You sure it can’t wait, Dylan?” He rotated his wrist to check his watch. “We are just getting underway.”

“I’ll be quick.”

He nodded begrudgingly as I walked towards him, holding out the small plastic slip from his desk.

---