Page 21 of My Damaged Protector

I don't know. But I guess I've been avoiding looking further into myself since I lost Justin.

Just thinking about him not being in the world brings me so much pain. Now imagine if I allow myself to think about how he died, the hand I had in it, it will cripple me.

There's a fresh silence in the room, and I raise my head to look at Sarah, where she's seated. I still don't know how she found out I was in the hospital or why she bothered to come.Surely, she would be angry that I left her yet again without a goodbye, but somehow she came anyway.

She's too good for me. I don't deserve her one bit. Yet here she is in this room, willing to stick by me. For however long, I don't know. But if she's here, offering her time to me, shouldn't I just take what she's offering now and forever cherish it when our time is finally up?

She notices me looking at her, and she reddens under my gaze. Her skin color now matches the fire that's her hair.

You don't deserve her, Ian.

Yeah, I know.

“Why are you here?” She speaks gently into the quiet room. Our eyes meet at her words, and I want so badly to tell her the truth.

But would she believe me?

Do I even believe the billions I'm told I now have but can't access for a while?

One thing is certain, though: if all pans out, I may be in town for a while.

“Job search.” I blurt out the first sensible thing that comes to my head. “I'm here to search for jobs.”

Her brows go up at my words. Her lips purse together as she digests my words. Her mouth opens as if she wants to speak, but she stops herself almost as quickly as her mouth opens. Then she nods. The action shows she's taken my word for it, but the expression on her face says otherwise.

The medication I was given at the hospital finally starts to kick in, and I feel my eyelids drooping.

A yawn escapes me, drawing her attention to me.

“I'm beat. Should I walk you out?”

She shakes her head and waves for me to get on the bed properly. “Don't worry about me. I can find my way out. This is my town.”

I don't have much strength to argue, so I just nod at her words and crawl up the bed until I'm properly situated before I offer her a grateful smile.

“I'm really glad we got to meet again,” I say, knowing the chances of me seeing her here when I wake up are slim.

I was just being delusional, thinking there could ever be more to us.

“Yeah, me too,” she responds back with a smile of her own.

As my eyes close in finality for the night, I hold onto my last image of her, hoping to God that she's still around when I wake up again.

Sarah is gonewhen I wake up. I notice immediately as I open my eyes and find myself in an empty room that the seat she was previously occupying is empty.

Can't say I didn't see that coming.

Of course, she left. Who am I kidding? She deserves so much better than I'll ever be able to give her.

I force myself out of bed after a few minutes of wallowing and enter the bathroom, where I take a much-needed warm bath, careful not to reopen any wounds on my face.

When I'm done, I look at myself in the mirror. Some of the swelling has reduced, but you can still tell that I was in a fight. Ironically, my lips aren't affected at all, and I can't help but think of what good that will do to me.

I'd rather have busted lips and not have to speak to anyone for weeks. The only person I would have wanted to speak with left.

I wrap my towel round my waist and go back into the room, going straight for my bag. I drop my towel when I find shorts to wear, and the room’s door opens at that moment.

A startled sound escapes me as I turn to see who has entered without knocking. It's Sarah.

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