“You shouldn’t be able to hear this well at your age!” I called after her.

I sighed when I returned to the sitting area, not making eye contact with Jaxus.

“I like her,” he said when I didn’t speak.

“You would.” I made myself another cup of tea. This time without the special herbs from Gran.

“What’s her name?”

“Rosemary, but everyone calls her Gran.” I returned to the seating area, gaze returning to him. I couldn’t help it. He looked good like this, at home in my home, as comfortable as he was.

I couldn’t get used to it. This wasn’t the life I would be allowed here or in the capital. I was doomed to be pulled in opposite directions for the rest of my life.

“What are we doing today? Before this dinner.” His gaze stayed on me even as I dropped mine to the tea.

“I want to go to the archives to see if I can find more information on the treatments Gran talked about.”

He didn’t answer right away. “Is that a good idea? You overdid it yesterday and you need to recover.”

“I’m here to help Nyx. I won’t be able to rest knowing we are all depending on his recovery. Knowing my friends are suffering. I owe it to Kol to help Nyx.” I closed my eyes, fighting tears.

His arm wrapped around me, pulling me into him. “I know. But you can’t pour from an empty cup. You need to rest, too.”

“I will. I promise.” The weight on my shoulders seemed to ease just a little with his arm around me.

“Tell me you have indoor plumbing in these treehouses? I need a soak before I have to face your betrothed.” He squeezed me again before getting up far too soon.

“Sorry, no.” I scrunched up my face. “We have a bathhouse.”

“Is the bathhouse going to be packed full of healers judging me?”

“I’m afraid so.”

“Then tell me where the nearest river is,” he said, all in an exhale.

“You won’t be able to find it on your own. I’ll have to show you—” I hesitated, realizing I was volunteering to accompany him while he got naked in the river, which didn’t seem like a good idea at all.

“Let’s go.” He offered his hand.

This was a mistake, but I took it.

I looked longingly at the bathhouse while we passed silently through the trees. Life dotted the canopy as the city settled into the work or school day. The healing gift rarely showed up outside of our bloodlines, but if it did, all the trainees were sent here to train. Most of the walkways and passageways betweenthe trees were above ground level, so it wasn’t common to run into another fae walking on the ground. At least we had that going for us.

“How far is it?” Jaxus looked positively out of place with the woven basket filled with soap, towels, and his fresh clothes. He was far too big for this place, being at least a head taller than was typical, and perhaps the most alarming—happy. He didn’t wear a serious expression while walking with his head down like healers. His gaze was up and his grin stretched to his eyes.

It was infectious and I fell into our typical demeanor. Almost forgetting the pressure home put on me.

“Not too much further.”

“No wonder you don’t have a lot of dragons here. It must be impossible to fly in this part of the kingdom.” His fingers brushed trees as we passed. Reverent, light touches. Sacred. Treating them like the souls they were. As alive as we were.

Outsiders didn’t know this. Couldn’t know this. It made me wonder what it was like where he was from. “No, like I said, our flyers are mostly pegasus. Their size better suits the terrain. They can run or fly without too much trouble. You are just too big,” I answered almost absentmindedly while recalling all the things Jaxus had said about where he came from.

There were so few pieces. I knew him so well, and yet, I didn’t know what wrought him. Had I been so reluctant to bond with him and accept my place that I’d not allowed myself to know him?

I exhaled, realizing the sadness eating at my gut was because I wanted to know him. I hoped he would let me.

“Why do you touch the trees as we pass?” I blurted out of nowhere.