“Commanding,” I finished for her.
She nodded. “But he’s leaving that to Jaxus.”
No wonder the King wasn’t happy. Nyx had fucked off to do the Goddess knew what, leaving a stranger to make decisions.
“I think it could be something to do with him not being able to bring Kol home. A memorial is not the same. It doesn’t feel like closure to him. It’s like he can’t rest while it’s unfinished. Like he won’t ever truly accept losing his other half.”
It started to click into place. I wasn’t sure what I was feeling. But there had to be something I was missing. It was like a syndrome I’d read about, but it couldn’t be. He was acting like he’d lost his soul-bonded.
“What are you thinking?” Zaria asked.
“Sorry,” I said. “I’m just going over what I know about grief.”
She searched my face.
“I will look into it,” I reassured her. I didn’t have time for more research, but I had no choice. I had to figure it out. The kingdom’s survival may rely on Nyx being well enough to command the armies. We couldn’t suffer his loss, too. There was no more of his line left. He was the last Asra. If this drove him to madness, who could take his place?
I took Zaria’s hands in mine. “I’m going to figure something out. I promise you.”
I had to.
None of us could bear to lose Nyx, too.
EIGHTEEN
KIERA
“Are you ready for this?” Jaxus asked, looking down at me as we stood outside Nyx’s office.
“No. But it needs to be done.”
“Are you two going to come in or stand out there all day?” Nyx called from beyond the door. “You know dragons can hear really well, right?”
Jaxus opened the door and held it for me to pass, closing it behind us. “I’m a dragon too, remember?” he replied.
“Then you should have the sense not to have your little whispered conversations outside my door.”
“No one was whispering. We’ve come to talk to you,” I told him.
We had agreed to keep the focus solely on the undead today. He was going to resist, so telling him we were generally concerned for his mental state as well was going to push himover the edge. We needed him to see sense on one issue, then we would regroup and figure out how to approach the other.
“About?” He leaned forward, pressing the tips of his fingers to his lips.
“About the undead,” I replied firmly. I was calm and determined, Jaxus glancing at me with encouraging eyes. He was proud of me for standing behind my principles. This was for the poor soul in the dungeons.
“What about it?”
I leant forward to mirror him. “See, this is the problem, Nyx. You see him as an ‘it.’ That is an undead fae down there, a real soul. Goddess bless him. He may have had a family who loved him. He may still feel. We don’t know. All I know is there is nothing that can be done for him and I think it’s time to let him go to the Goddess. You can save him that way by ending his turmoil.”
“You can’t be sure nothing can be done,” he insisted.
“In the history of all the kingdoms, there is no record of reversing this kind of necromancy.”
“That you know of,” he scoffed. Then he leveled me with a glare. One that clearly conveyed that while I could never confirm it, he was vaguely aware that my family kept older records that were no longer thought to exist. Was he asking me to leave my work to go back home on this fool’s errand?
I glanced sideways at Jaxus because I was not willing to have anyone else aware of the family secret. Even my—flying partner, dragon, friend? This was ridiculous. I needed to get what he was to me figured out soon.
At my warning glance at Jaxus, Nyx seemed to back off.