“Jaxus?”I called again.

“I heard. That seems like a lot.”

“Is that normal?” I asked Faolan.

“It’s more than it used to be. Ever since our two guests crash-landed here six months ago, and then one of our best dragons left with them and decided not to return, things have been—tighter, shall we say?”

“Got that?” I sent to Jaxus.

“Got it, Firefly. Stay safe.”

“You too.”

Faolan pointed at my face. “You get this look when you’re speaking to him. It’s the cutest thing I think I’ve ever seen.”

“Oh hush, you!” I swatted his hand away. “Now, where are we eating? I’m hungry.”

The time spent apart while Jaxus worked on the council made me miss him. I hadn’t realized how dependent I’d become on his company. It was far too late when he found our bed. Half asleep, I reached for him. He happily gathered me in his arms and stroked his fingers over my bare skin.

I breathed him in and spoke the words that had weighed on my mind all day. “Is this all too dangerous?”

He didn’t answer for a long time, and I worried he’d fallen asleep, but he finally spoke. “I don’t think so. I wouldn’t do anything to put your life at risk.”

“It’s not just my life.”

He kissed my forehead. “I know, and they know. They wouldn’t have agreed if they didn’t know the risks, but I wouldn’t put them at any more risk than you.”

I frowned under his lips. “And you?”

“I don’t think I’d be able to forgive myself if we didn’t try. How much hinges on us, Firefly?” There was sorrow in his voice. Pain I hadn’t detected before.

“If it weren’t for Nyx, would you want to stay here?”

He hesitated.

“Jaxus.” My heart broke a little as I cupped his face. “I don’t want to burn bridges here if you will mourn your home for the rest of our lives. We will have to find another way.”

He put his hand over mine, shaking his head. “This is not the reality we live in. I can’t stay here and be happy knowing what the elders are ignoring. Maybe in a perfect life, I’d have no reason to leave, but then I wouldn’t have you, and I would not trade what we have for peace, or my home or family or anything if it meant losing us. I will live through a thousand wars and defy every living soul to spend another day with you.”

I melted at his words, lifting my face to find his lips, pressing into his mouth. Our tongues tangled, and we met like the merging of magic.

I needed him.

Needed to ground myself in us.

But even as we came together, it weighed on me that he’d never said he wouldn’t put himself at risk. He wouldn’t let me come to harm, or anyone else if he could help it, but I had a nagging fear he would put himself in jeopardy.

FIFTY

JAXUS

In the days since Kiera and Faolan had scoped out the library, this was the first chance we’d had to see what their night watch was like, but I hated leaving Kiera in bed and I wasn’t sure about this plan.

“Do you really think this is the best way?” I whispered, leaning against the building while we stood tucked in the shadows of the alleyway.

“You have to. It’s the perfect distraction.”

“Won’t they see through it? They know I’d never act like that.” I don’t know why I stood here or why I’d agreed to meet Faolan.