Page 99 of Embracing Trust

When we get back to my house, I dish up my favorite ice cream and we sit outside. We talk for hours and by the time we go inside, it’s past midnight.

I drag out blankets and pillows to the living room and Merilee and I make ourselves comfortable on my couches. I turn off the lights and snuggle into my blankets. I close my eyes and I hear Merilee as she tries to get situated. A bra hits me in the face, and I laugh.

“What’s so funny?” Merilee asks.

“A large piece of lingerie just hit me in the face.”

Merilee chuckles. “Sorry. I can’t sleep with my bra. Didn’t mean to hit you.”

“You’re lucky I didn’t get a concussion,” I tease.

We always joke about her being well-endowed and my lack thereof.

Merilee huffs. “If you hit me with yours, I probably wouldn’t even notice.”

“Probably not,” I agree and snicker.

“Unless all that underwire pokes my eye out.” Merilee chortles and snorts at the same time.

“Oh no! Don’t snort.” I let out a howl which causes Merilee to crack up in a fit of giggles and another snort. I’m holding my stomach. “Stop!” I beg. I wipe my eyes and gasp for a breath.

We manage to settle in and calm down. We end up awake and we talk all night like best friends do. We talk about our dreams, our hope for the future, our best memories, and reminisce about better days. We laugh, we cry a little, and we finally fall asleep just as the sun begins its ascension in the eastern sky.

Chapter Forty-two

Ryan

Thankfully, Julia did finally answer a text. It’s been four weeks now, so hopefully, that’s given her the time she’s needed to cool off. I don’t know what to expect. I don’t know if she’ll accept my apology, but if nothing else, I may get the closure I need to move on. Not sure I can accept moving on, but this is the conversation that needs to happen.

My heart pounds in my chest and although I drank about a gallon of water on my way over here, my mouth is as dry as the Afghan desert. I didn’t call or text and she doesn’t know I’m coming over. I figure the element of surprise may work in my favor. Besides, I couldn’t take the chance that she would either hang up or simply refuse to see me.

Hell, she may still even refuse to see me—either not opening the door or slamming it in my face once she sees I’m here.

I take a deep breath, walk up the porch steps, and knock on the front door.

This is it. This is my fate. Everything is riding on this conversation with the woman I want to build my future with.

I hear footsteps inside and she opens the door. Her eyes are dull—not their usual brightness—more like lackluster. Her face is pale like she could use some time in the sun.

My chest is in a vise and crushes my bones to dust. I let out a deep sigh.

This is what you’ve done to her. You’ve taken away her joy.

I give a small wave. “Hi.”

She steps onto the porch, takes a seat on the porch swing, and points to the wicker chair across from her. I take a seat.

“What’re you doing here?” Her tone is indifferent, callous even. It breaks me because I’m the one who’s hardened her heart.

“I’m here to talk to you.”

She crosses her arms across her chest. “I can talk for a few minutes. I have work to do.”

“Julia,” I sit up straight in my chair and look directly at her beautiful face. “I’m sorry. Everything I thought I had with you, I destroyed it and watched it crumble through my fingers.”

She shrugs.

“I know you’re angry and you have every right to be. I’ve made some bad choices along the way and I’m here to clear up everything and hope you’ll give me another chance.”

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