Page 59 of Close Knit

“I guess.” She pauses, kissing a lamb on its head before sighing. “The worst of it started after my eleventh birthday.”

“What happened?”

“I planned a huge party—fairy-themed, obviously.”

“Obviously.”

“Prim and I spent hours designing decorations, and Dani took me shopping for the best outfit my allowance could buy. I picked out a vintage frock covered in coral glitter. When the big day came, I expected my entire class to show up, but only the popular girls came.” My stomach tightens. “They spent the whole month before that getting close to me, but when my moms left us alone, they huddled in a corner, giggling behind their phones. They left before we even cut the cake. The next day, I found out they had posted pictures of me and my party online, mocking me.”

Anger rises in my throat. “Fuck those girls.”

“It’s in the past now. I always say that some people survive bullying, and others become bullies. The rest are like me, they take up knitting and make it their entire personality,” she jokes. The lightness in her voice doesn’t quite land.

“I’m sorry you had to deal with that.”

“It sucked, but it made me a better and more empathic person. Unfortunately, most people have to deal with bullies in their lives. I guess you know something about that.” She kicks my foot with her boot. “After that encounter with the fan.”

You have no idea, Daph.

My chest tightens, and I pick at my cuticles, tearing the skin to relieve the pressure. Each sharp sting is a reminder of my failures.

Knowing Daphne’s story, I’m ashamed of how I treated her when I first arrived two months ago. Letting my fears take control and keep me safe was how I survived my bullying.

Unlike me, she became more resilient. She started helping others. Perhaps I could try that. Opening up to Matos at practice a few weeks ago wasn’t the worst thing. It felt validating to know that the last two years weren’t just a nightmare I’d concocted.

The silence stretches like a bridge between me and her. I want to cross it.

Don’t be so fucking weak, Hastings. Rossi’s voice barrels into my mind. I retreat inward. My mind races, replaying every criticism, every failure.

“Cameron?” Daphne’s voice anchors me back into the present.

“Huh?”

“Where’d you go?” she asks gently.

“What do you mean?” I tense, clutching the little lamb tighter into my chest.

“You just sort of disappeared behind your eyes. Are you okay?”

“Fine. Yeah.” I brush her off, but she stares at me, unconvinced. Maybe I can take one step forward. “When I first got to Lyndhurst, I didn’t know how to be open,” I begin shakily. “Honestly, I’m still struggling to get on with my teammates. My old coach, he was tough, led with fear and discipline. Nothing was ever good enough, but his methods got us to fifth in the league.” Her eyebrows furrow, so I add, “That’s a good place to be if you’re the only American keeper in the Premier League.”

Her foot gently grazes against mine, and the subtle touch is enough to calm me. She’s beautiful, truly listening as if every word matters.

“I had no idea. What about your old team? You must’ve had someone you could lean on.”

“They were tough too, except for my backup goalie, Charlie. He was my best friend there. In my first year, he helped me get through the club’s hazing. We did everything together, not just practice. He showed me a different world in London. Funny enough, I was his backup first, and after he got injured, I stepped up. But then—” I pause, the weight of the memory pressing down on me. “Things changed.” I trusted him the most, and he invaded my privacy. The one person who was supposed to have my back. It shattered me. I lost my confidence and my best friend in one fell swoop.

I expect to find that dreaded pity written across her face, but instead I find an emotion I can’t read.

“Is that why you never hang out with your teammates?”

She really sees right through me. Even when I’m scared—scared of making mistakes, of getting yelled at, of not being enough.

“Sort of.”

“Thank you for sharing that with me,” she says softly. “You don’t have to carry all of that alone anymore, Cameron. I’ll be a good friend to you, and you have the rest of the guys too, right? What about your coach now?”

“My new coach believes that friendship is the solution to all our problems.”

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