Page 110 of Close Knit

She’s right. I can ignore the tabloids again. All that matters is getting back in the game and winning the Premier League. I want to be better for my team, and I want to be better for her.

“Speaking of football, I don’t know if I’ll be able to play for the rest of the season. The last update I got from the club was a text from my agent saying she was talking to Coach, but truthfully, I deserve to sit out.” At Overton, Rossi wouldn’t have hesitated to pull me for weeks. I know I’m a good keeper. I know I can be one of the best, but even still, his constant criticism has been the voice of doubt inside of me.

“Don’t say—”

“No, I do,” I say. “I made selfish moves. I let my feelings get in the way of the match, and now my team can’t trust me to not be impulsive on the field. If I don’t make things right, my career will be over.”

“That can’t be true.”

“It is. My team tried with me, and when I started letting them in, I pushed them all away again. They didn’t even look me in the eye during halftime.”

“You just need to talk to them. Once they know what happened at Overton and with Charlie, they won’t hold it against you.”

“That’s the problem. I don’t know how, or if they’ll even care.” I sigh, reaching my free hand up and running it over the net above us.

“Don’t write them off,” she advises, her voice soft but firm. “Your past isn’t your identity, not really. It’s the steps you take after. That’s where you truly find yourself.”

I nod. “You’re right.” At this point, I have nothing to lose—well, except my contract, career, and everything I worked my entire life for. “Can I come to your next knitting circle and try to make amends there?”

“I think that’s a good idea. Tamu will be there, and so will your defense.”

Okay. That’s a good place to start. However, I haven’t a clue about the reality TV they watch. “Are you going to be watchingLust Island?” I cringe. The thought of seeing my ex-situationship on the screen while I attempt to smooth things over with my teammates sounds like hell.

“No, silly. That show has tragically come to an end. The contestant I was rooting for won, Georgia Woods.” She smiles. “We’re watchingThe Great British Bake Offnow. It’s really easy to follow.”

“Okay.” I sigh. “This is going to be hard for me. I’m not great at sharing my feelings.”

“Yeah, and you’re not great at apologizing either,” she teases.

“Hey!” I drop my hand from twirling her hair and tickle her side.

“I’m kidding! Look, from what I’ve seen, you’re definitely capable of opening up. You can start small, and I’ll be there with you. Be honest, and talk from the heart.”

What if they use the livestream against me? Or think I’m lying? What if they think I’m weak? “Maybe I could also get them some gifts. You liked the soft serve machine, so—” I stop, my voice faltering. Doubt gnaws at me.

“Wouldn’t hurt your case.”

I run through the ideas. “A new TV for all of them?”

“Probably needs to be a little more personal than that.” She tilts her chin upward, the light illuminating her neck.

“Right.”

“Show them that you know who they are. It’s not about grand gestures; it’s the small stuff that counts. Show them they matter, that you see them, that you care about their friendship.”

“Um—well, I’ve noticed that Tae-woo…” I start.

“Maybe let’s start with calling them by their first names,” Daphne suggests. “They never call each other by their last names.”

That’s an easy switch. “Jung always has a new pair of sneakers and a ton of designer shit; maybe I could get him a cool pair of kicks?”

“Yes. Perfect!” She nods approvingly. “You know, Sven is really homesick. Maybe get him some treats from Norway that might remind him of home?”

“I can figure out how to import a basket of stuff.”

“Make sure to add a few things in there for me.” She winks.

In a few minutes, we have the rest of the gifts figured out. I’ll talk to Dante and get Omar a VIP membership to the hottest London club. I’ll get Ibrahim tickets to a music festival, maybe Tomorrowland. Tamu collects watches, and I have a great guy in London who services my Rolexes and could probably hook me up.

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