Page 34 of In the Arms of a Hero

“How do you figure that?”

“You’ve met Sally. She and her husband, Toby, were great friends and neighbors. Sally made sure I ate, and Toby would come over and help my dad with my exercises to strengthen my muscles. I was only two when my mom left, so I have no memories of her. Between my dad, Andy, Sally, Toby, and the others who stepped in, I was well cared for. But Andy was seven years old. I don’t guess there’s any good time for a parent to walk out, but that was a really shitty time for him. He was angry, and it took him years to figure out how to deal with that anger.”

“I can’t begin to imagine what that was like for him,” she said, choosing her words carefully and hoping they were the right ones he needed to hear. “But I imagine that at some point when you were older, you also felt that sting of her leaving.”

He barked out a scoff and nodded. “Dad made sure Andy got some counseling, but it wasn’t until he was an adult before he really understood how to deal with his anger.” He squeezed her fingers and chuckled. “Would you believe he and Ivy knew each other in high school? But it wasn’t a good relationship. He was an asshole to her and assumed he’d never see her again. Years later, he meets up with her, falls hard, and had some serious apologizing to do.”

Belinda smiled, having witnessed Andy and Ivy's love but imagining Ivy giving him hell for the way she’d been treated.

They were silent for a moment before he continued. “I blamed myself for a long time, thinking that I was the reason Mom left. I’m sure an armchair psychiatrist would have a great time looking at all my behaviors as an adult, especially with avoiding commitment, tracing it all back to being abandoned.”

“Leave first before you get left?”

“Oh, yeah. I’ve had some long talks with my dad and Andy over the past few months and realized that was my pattern. Some of my past relationships were with nice women, but I think I knew right from the beginning they weren’t the one for me. I could have some fun, enjoy being around someone’s company, and keep things light with no deep feelings, but always knew I’d be the one to leave first. It wasn’t until you came along that everything changed.”

Her heartbeat began to hammer against her ribs as she wondered what his next words would be. “How did everything change, Aaron?”

He shifted again, this time twisting his body to more fully face her, and their hands were still held between them, resting on his thigh.

“You have the most beautiful eyes.”

She blinked but remained silent, now even more unsure of where he was going with his thoughts.

“When I first stepped into the bakery, my gaze landed on Bess, and like any red-blooded male, I thought she was pretty. But when my gaze swung over to you standing behind the counter, I thought you were beautiful. When I got closer in line and I saw that your blue eyes were almost purple, I knew you were drop-dead gorgeous. And yeah, I wanted a date, so I flirted.”

A little smile slipped across her lips, remembering the first time she saw him in the shop. “I remember thinking you were one seriously attractive man. And then, when you told me your name, I remembered you from high school. What I never told you was that I had a crush on you back then.”

His wide eyes gave evidence to his surprise.

She laughed and shook her head. “You shouldn’t be surprised, Aaron. I think every girl with a beating heart in high school had a crush on you.”

He shook his head and rolled his eyes, then sighed. “By the time I was in middle school, Andy had worked with me lifting weights, and I was shoving down protein drinks so that I could keep growing. We spent hours in the backyard throwing a football or tossing a baseball back and forth. I’d felt so different in elementary school, still struggling a bit physically and with schoolwork, that when I finally started succeeding in athletics in high school, I let it go to my head. I’m surprised you noticed anything about me other than my overinflated ego since it would hardly let me through the door!”

She laughed and twisted her fingers so that their hands were linked. “I don’t think any of us should be judged by who we were in high school. I told you that I was a complete nerd all the way through high school, living through the people I focused my lens on.”

They sat quietly for another moment, each seeming to sift through their teenage angst.

“After I flirted with you in the shop, I knew I wanted to keep coming around. You were like the proverbial flame, and I was the moth. I couldn’t stay away even though I knew I’d probably get burned.”

She tilted her head to the side. “Why did you think I would burn you?”

“Because somehow I always imagined that someone I cared for would walk away… again. While I might not have remembered the day Mom packed up and left, I do remember the feeling I had when I’d wonder when she was coming home and was told that she wasn’t.”

“Oh, Aaron, my heart hurts for you. I’m so sorry. She’s missed out on the best things that life could’ve given her.”

He stared at her for a long time, searching her face, before finally allowing his lips to offer a tiny curve. After another moment, a wince replaced the smile. “I felt really bad that youoverheard my conversation with Andy. It was a shit way to find out about my past relationships and a shit way to be introduced to my family. On top of that, I’d been worried about the timing of trying to start a new relationship when I had so much going on at work. My head was fucked up.” He sighed heavily. “I really liked you, Belinda. I should have never let you walk away.”

She shook her head slowly, not speaking until he looked at her again. “You don’t owe me an apology, Aaron. I overheard a conversation that wasn’t meant for my ears. I looked back and realized that I had done the exact thing that you had been accused of. I walked away before we even had a chance.”

“We both walked away for our own reasons.” A heavy sigh left his lips. “Can you believe that was almost a year ago?”

“A lot has happened since then.”

“Mainly, I pulled my head out of my ass.”

She threw her head back and laughed, and when her mirth slowed, she found him staring at her with a smile on his face.

“I realized months ago that I wanted to take the time to get to know you again, Belinda. Slowly. I wanted to give you a chance to get to know me.”

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