Page 33 of Crossing Lines

“Carter Wayne Malone, shut your mouth right now!” I moved down the stairs, bile rising in my gut. I hated seeing this. I got in his face. “What in the hell are you doing?”

“Defending you! He let you get hurt.” He jerked in Peter’s grip. “He let you get hurtagain!”

I sighed. “This isn’t his fault. I tried to make it his fault, but it’s not. No one could have predicted that would have happened.” I hid my face in my hands, careful to not touch my cheek. “I swear to all that’s holy…” I dropped my hands andturned to face Trace. I felt tears stinging my eyes, but I ignored them, letting them fall. “That attack wasn’t your fault. I’m sorry I yelled at you. I’d say it’s the baby’s fault, but that was all on me. Hormones aside, it was on me. I got scared. I was afraid I wasn’t enough to keep me and the babies safe. I took that fear, turned it to anger, and took it out on you. That’s not fair to you. I’m sorry.” His arms opened, and I leaned into him, letting my tears fall harder.

“I’m sorry. I should have told you the second we figured it out this morning.”

He’d tried, though. It really wasn’t his fault. “He was already here.”

“I know, but if we’d have acted faster, you wouldn’t have been alone for a moment. He wouldn’t have been able to get to you.” His arms tightened around me. I squeezed my eyes shut and winced at the pain raging in my shoulder. I ignored it. It reminded me that I was alive. I just let the tears keep falling.

I was turning into such a girl with all of this crying.

“You’re letting him off the hook?” Carter sighed behind me. I turned, wiping my face, cursing when I hit my cheek. Fucking hell, that hurt. I stood between him and the other two Malone boys.

“It’s not his fault. I should never have blamed him. I see that now after talking to Daddy and Doc G. I was projecting my fear into anger, and he was the one to bear the brunt of it. That makes me the asshole here, not him. Just like you’re doing now. You alone, I might add. You want to protect me, and I love you for it, but it’s unjustified in this situation. Trace wasn’t the one who attacked me or caused me to be attacked. If he had, do you think he would still be alive?”

“Dad would have torn him in half if he had,” Trevor said, nodding his head.

Peter nodded and added, “Fish food for sure. There’s a lot of him. He’d feed the whole lake.”

I snorted.

His grin told me that was what he wanted.

“I’m sorry, everyone. This cluster of fucks is all mine. I just…I don’t even know.”

“You need to learn it’s okay to be scared. You don’t have to be the big, mean badass all the time.” Dani Lynn approached and hugged me. “Even Superman needed a day off every once in a while.”

“I know, it’s just hard giving that up. It’s not me.” I pulled back and rested my hand over my stomach. I had lots of reasons to let fear make me its bitch, but I had just as many reasons to not let it. Chaos. Utter chaos was now my life. It was time to pass that baton back to someone else. I didn’t want it anymore.

“Well, let me let you in on a secret. It’s what moms do. We hide that fear deep in our souls and do what we need to for our babies. I’m fucking proud of you. You kept yourself and that baby in there,” she pointed to my stomach, “and that little one up there,” she pointed to the porch where Daddy and Doc G stood, “safe. So you got a few bruises and a bullet wound. Big deal. You’ve had worse. That’ll all heal, and the scar will remind you that no matter what, you’ll find a way through the shit that comes at you. That little boy up there is alive because of you. If you hadn’t seen him that day, so many things could have happened. You’re standing on two feet, even if they are a little unsteady, because you did some quick thinking. Never doubt that you can do anything. I know you’re too stubborn for anything else.”

“I’m sorry, man.” I turned to see Carter giving Trace his hand. The big ape pulled Cart in for a massive hug. The kid grunted, and I snorted again. Served him right.

“All right.” I turned to face them. “Carter, let’s get this out in the open. Trace will crush you. I love you, kid, but let’s face it, if he hulks out, your skinny ass is cat food. Let me handle my shit. I can beat his ass if need be.” I winked at Trace. “Now, my freaking face hurts. I need ice and food. Lots of food. I’m starving. Who’s coming?” I moved up on the porch and took Ethan from Doc G. I was a little unsteady, so I had to take it slowly. Nothing in this world would make me drop him.

“Thank you, both of you.” I gave both Doc and Shelby a one-armed hug.

“Don’t worry, I didn’t do it out of the kindness of my heart. You’ll get a bill in the mail.” Shelby wasn’t even done before she was laughing. Everyone was a comedian today.

“Funny.” I laughed as I went back to where the others were. “Let’s go see Mrs. Nettie. A few racks of ribs and a steak the size of my face will make me happy.”

“Jesus.” Someone laughed.

“She’s not joking,” Carter stated, also laughing.

“Hope you have your wallets. I don’t have mine, and I’m not paying.” I grinned as I walked out through the gate, Ethan cuddled into my chest.

Chapter 14

Trace

The darkness was calming.I had my girl laying against my chest. Despite her injuries from this morning, or wait, was it a new day? If so, it would be yesterday now.

I glanced at the clock on the nightstand. Yep, it was almost 5:00 A.M., so it was yesterday. Despite her injuries and being scared, she was able to process what happened and what kind of a hard place I’d been in. We talked it all out over ribs and steak. That woman and her meat fetish.

My fingers gently caressed her golden locks as she lightly snored. It was adorable, but I’d never say that to her for fear of losing my balls. After getting back to Wayne’s, we’d come in here and talked for hours. Talking led to something more, and I think giving in and letting her have control was what she needed. She worked us both into a blissful ecstasy that was good for our souls. It healed the fissures that were starting to form.