Page 26 of Falling

When I’m safely strapped into my car, I try my hardest not to cry. I’m not a big crier. I’ve always thought it was weak. It just reminds me of the times I would fall on the ice and my old coach, Donaldson, and my mom would shout at me to get back up. I’d brush myself off and carry on skating with tears in my eyes.

I shake my head, fiddling with the screen in my car to press Gigi’s contact. The second the call connects, I feel like I’m transported right back into the comfort of her house: the millions of certificates that line the walls of her writing achievements, the photos of us as kids, and the smell of pierogies. God, I miss it. I missher.

“Hey, G. How are you?” I ask, a smile finally forming on my lips when she answers.

“I’m good. Just in bed, staring at the ceiling and contemplating life, you know?”

“So, the usual?”

“Pretty much.” She sighs, and I can already picture her bedroom lit up by her lava lamps that illuminate the Marvel posters on the wall. “I’ve been writing all day, and my agent thinks I’m burning myself out.”

I get a stupid jolt in my chest at her words. I wish I had the courage that she does. I wish I had the balls to self-publish my novel like she did a year ago. Her fantasy series, The Last Tear, went viral last winter, and she got over ten thousand sales within the first month. She was quickly signed to an agency and has been working toward getting a traditional pub deal for months.

I know how hard it is for her to make friends and socialize, but writing has been that escape for her like it is for me. With her learning difficulties, she and her mom made the decision to keep her out of school. Her books were making enough money to live off, and she’s more than happy to commit to being a full-time author while her agent works on getting her a deal.

“You should probably take a break,” I suggest, my shoulders relaxing as I stop at a red light. “Maybe you should come hang out with me, Scar, and Ken. We haven’t had brunch in a while. It could be fun.”

“It could also be hell,” she mutters. I know she’s not being harsh. It’s just how she is, so I just laugh. “Thanks for the offer though. How are you? Are you one step closer to becoming the next biggest figure skating star?”

“I’m… getting there,” I say. I launch into a five-minute rant about the team and the funding and the lack of support, and she listens to everything, offering her own solutions. A bake sale, again. “I think I’ve got something figured out though,” I say.

“Yeah?”

“There’s this guy?—”

“There’s always a guy.”

“He’s, like, the most popular guy at college. North’s golden boy. High school kids treat him like a hockey legend,” I explain, and she just laughs. “I was thinking that we pretend to date, get some buzz around our relationship, and see if that helps with drawing more attention back to the skating team. Do you think that’s a good idea?”

She’s quiet for a minute, no doubt mulling over the idea in her head. “That’s the best idea I’ve ever heard come out of your mouth, Amelia.”

I snort. “It was Scar’s idea.”

“That makes more sense,” Gigi says, and I laugh. “It sounds like a good plan. Why are you worried about it?”

“I-I’m not worried about it.”

“You wouldn’t be calling me to tell me that if you weren’t worried about it.”

I forgot just how well she knows me. “I think it’s going to work out, seriously. It’s just going to be a little weird adjusting to pretending to date someone when I haven’t dated anyone seriously other than Augustus.”

“What’s this guy’s name? Can I internet stalk him?”

I snort. “Miles Davis. Do your worst. He’s got an annoyingly clean record.”

I hear some shuffling on Gigi’s side, and I turn another corner. I was going to go straight home, but I need to work off this energy. Yes, it might be nervous energy but I’m not admitting that to her. If I can’t get the support the team needs, I can at least be a good asset to the team for as long as it lasts.

“You’re right. He seems like a boring, conventionally attractive guy who plays hockey,” Gigi says with a sigh.

“I know. It’s a real shame our society has come to this.”

“What’s worse is thatthisis your upgrade from Augustus. I mean, how do you go from him to thisgod?You’re hot as shit, and you settled for Mr. Porcelain Doll.” I laugh, pulling into a parking space outside the rink on campus. “I love you, Amelia, but I seriously don’t get how you put up with him for so long. I’ve dated more men and women in the time you’ve dated this mediocre douchebag.”

Laughter racks my entire body, tears springing to my eyes. Nobody makes me laugh as much as this girl does. She has absolutely no filter, and I love that about her. I love that she doesn’t feel like she needs to switch off parts of herself for me like she does with other people.

“I love you too, Gianna, which is why I’m not going to say anything to that,” I say, shaking my head as I pull my gym bag from the backseat of my car. “Look, I’m at the rink now. It was great catching up. I’ll see you soon.”

“Not if I see you first,” she says hauntingly.

---