Page 89 of Falling

When I’m dressed, he urges me to get inside my covers and then wraps them around me like I can’t do it on my own.

He passes me the glass of water that I hadn’t realized was there, and I take a few gulps. He places it back on the nightstand and gets into the bed with me. I’m lying down, tucked neatly under the covers as Miles sits beside me on top of them, looking down at me.

I turn to the ceiling and say, “I’m sorry about that. About calling you and having you pick us up. I shouldn’t have had a drink. It was a really stupid thing to do.”

“You don’t have to apologize to me, Wren,” he says. “If you think I’m going to lecture you or tell you what to do, I’m not. I’m glad you're having fun. All I want is for you to be happy. You deserve a break, you know.” He slides down onto the bed next to me, our shoulders brushing against each other as we both look up at the ceiling. Honestly, it hurts to look at him. It’s like there’s a fire in my chest whenever I do.

“I don't deserve anything, sometimes. I don't deserve you, and I especially don't deserve a break.”

I know how pathetic I sound, but I can’t tell my mouth to stop. He turns to me now, one arm resting beneath his cheek and the other wrapping a finger around my hair, and it distracts me for a second. I like that he does that. That he always needs to touch me or be close to me in some way.

“What makes you think that?”

I shrug. “My brain. My mom.”

He closes his eyes for a second before opening them. “When I see you skate, do you know what I see?” I swallow, shaking my head. “I see the most talented, smartest, skilled person I have ever met. I feel like I need to hold my breath when I watch you. I don’t even want to close my eyes sometimes in case I miss something, and that’s just when you’re practicing.”

I sigh, trying to let his words register, but my brain is still foggy. “I don’t think I try hard enough. If I tried hard enough, my mom would actually like me, and I wouldn't be constantly trying to gain her approval.”

“What makes you think she doesn’t like you? She’s your mom; she adores you,” he whispers.

I laugh incredulously. “She can adore me, but she doesn’tloveme or maybe even like me. I think I’ve known that for a while. She thinks I’m a good skater and I can be what she didn’t get the chance to be. But I think deep down, she doesn’t see me as her daughter in some fucked up way.”

His face is so close to mine now, the light touch of his fingers in my hair grounding me to this moment. “You have no idea, do you?”

“What?”

“You have no idea how special you are, Wren, and it breaks my heart every time I hear you speak like that. I would give up everything I have for you to realize that you're perfect in every way that counts.”

I feel like all the alcohol has left my body as the words leave his mouth and puncture me right in the heart. This is exactly what it feels like for my inner child to be healed.

I do what I’ve been needing to do since I saw him today and wrap my arms around him. It’s a little struggle at first since we’re both lying down, but once we’re comfortable, I nuzzle my face into his neck, breathing in his lavender smell. I think I could stay buried with my head in his neck forever if he let me. His presence is so utterly perfect that I just want it to consume me.

“Can you stay here tonight? Just hold me,” I ask into his skin, not wanting him to leave me just yet. Yeah, I really am an emotional drunk.

He lets out a heavy sigh. “Wren, you know?—”

I cut him off before he can say no. “Can you, please? I need you. I need you here.” I think he’s the only thing keeping me calm.The only thing that is keeping my heartbeat at a settled pace. I also think I want him around all the time. I’ve got so used to having him here that I can’t imagine being alone again.

“I was going to say that you should know I’d do anything for you, princess,” he whispers. I pull apart from him, leaning on his chest to look at him. He brushes a strand of hair out of my face, smiling, and it might be the prettiest sight I’ve ever seen. “If you want me to stay, I’ll stay.”

I bite my lip to stop myself from crying. “You’re a really good guy, Miles. Like, almost too good.”

“I know.” He grins.

“I take it back. You’re the worst.”

He presses a kiss to my nose, and I think it’s the sweetest thing anyone has ever done. “Just shut up and let me hold you.”

He gently pushes me to turn around until my back is flush against his front, his arms braced tight around me. I don’t tell him about Austin or how stressed I am because it doesn’t feel like the right time. All I need is to be held by him, and it seems like he needs it too. So he holds me.

All night.

He’s justthere.

28

WREN

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