Page 37 of Matched

Hayden clears her throat and waves over the server. “Shots! We haven’t done a birthday shot yet.”

Thirty minutes later, Marge and Taya head to the restroom and I get the pleasure of watching all the heads turn as they go.

“You went to Italy to study sculpting?” I say to Hayden.

“Yeah, it was a great experience. We studied under a master sculptor and then shared our work at the end of the class. I’m so glad I did it.”

I’m genuinely shocked someone so young has had her artwork on display. When I was twenty-two, all I was doing was getting trashed and trying to keep up with my mom’s relationships. “That’s really cool. Did your family go out to see it?”

“No, Dad was either on a mission or training and Mom was with Leslie. I don’t think they really know all the details or understand it fully.”

“Well, I’d love to see your stuff someday.”

Marge and Taya return arm in arm. When they sit down, Marge takes hold of Taya’s hand. “I know this is still all new to you, and the other wives haven’t been as comforting.” Taya is smiling, but her eyes have a sheen on them.

I’m in awe of how put together Marge is. This has been her life for most of her adulthood—having Bear leave over and over, never really being able to make plans together, never really knowing if he would be okay. And while our husbands are only gone at training right now, it’s all a stark reminder of how often they do leave and what they’re training for.

I raise my glass and salute Marge with it. “Bear’s lucky to have you.”

“Hell yes, he is, and you better bet I remind him every day.” She pauses to wipe a small tear that runs down her cheek. “But I’m lucky too. He really cares about us.” She looks over to Taya. “It doesn’t ever go away, the missing and the fear, but you get more used to it. And you have us.”

Taya leans in to hug Marge and it hits me that this is what it means to be a wife to these men. There’s a strength most people don’t realize. Through it all, these women have to be at home alone or act as single moms for months at a time. Even if things continued getting better with Tony, would I be able to handle a life like this?

Taya looks over at me and I try to hide the anxiety written across my face by taking a large gulp of my drink. But there’s no use, since she knows me so well. She offers me a weak smile. “Is all of this getting to you?”

I set the glass back down and sigh. “No, I’m just thinking about Tony is all.”

Marge’s eyes go wide and she looks at me. “Honey, I’m sorry I haven’t even checked in with you. This is your first time with Tony gone.”

To my surprise and horror, my eyes start to well with soft tears. “No, it’s okay, I’m fine.” My voice catches in my throat. Christ, I’m far from fine.

“You probably miss him like crazy.”

I don’t need Taya’s truth bombs at this moment. “Not in the slightest.”

The three woman stare at me, eyes unblinking and with a slight tilt to their heads.

I quiver a little bit under their combined assault and throw my hands up. “Okay, I do miss him. I just don’t know where we stand. Every time I think things are working, something happens to make us take two steps back.”

Marge leans across the table and puts her hand on mine. “We’ve all let our husbands leave during some of the most inopportune moments. Their jobs don’t stop for their home lives. And I think it’s pretty evident Tony means a lot to you.”

I don’t want to be like my mother, divorce after divorce. But more than that, a big part of my heart wants things to work out with Tony for the long haul. Just for me. And I can’t say his body doesn’t light me up. We might have had a little bit of an awkward first time, but that can be worked through.

Let’s be real. I would love to work through that part with him.

I wipe my eyes and tuck a loose curl behind my ear. “Hey now, we’re not here to listen to me vent about Tony’s being gone. We still got movie and wine time.”

We eventually settle the check, and Marge and I make sure the other is okay to drive. We both tapered off our drinking earlier so that we wouldn’t have to leave our cars here overnight. After Taya and I get into my car, I follow Marge back to her place and we all change into our comfy lounging clothes to finish the night gawking at a longhaired, buff, blond Asgardian god.

Although, deep in my heart, I’d do anything to be gawking at my husband right now.

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